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Great Marlins fans, beer pong, dogs on Viagra and more

     Some Friday meanderings to kick-start Memorial Day Weekend...

     Marlins fans catch a lot of criticism for non-support. You know Aaadwillis what, though? Those few thousand who stayed 'til the end past midnight last night, through the rain, and after a 1 1/2-hour rain delay -- they have to be some of the best fans in baseball. I mean that. You'd find right here today's column by me off that wild game. Congrats to all who stayed. Glad you were rewarded.

     Pat Riley asking for decisions from Alonzo Mourning and Gary Payton prior to the NBA draft, and it's simple. Zo has some fuel and fire left, and Heat fans should hope he returns. Payton? In the immortal words of Borat: "Not so much."

Aaabeerpong      Oh, and Riles is right in ripping the NBA's lottery system. Let's make it official that ping-pong balls should not be used for anything except ping-pong. With the possible exception of beer pong.

     Redskin running back Clinton Portis, the ex-UMer, backed Michael Vick, seeming to find no problem with dog-fighting. Then quickly said he wasn't condoning it. C'mon Clint. If we knew you could backpedal that fast, you'd have been a cornerback.

    AaadanicaNot sure I'll be watching Sunday's Indianapolis 500. However, I will be interested in seeing Danica Patrick climbing in and out of her car.

     Just so we're clear on this: Newly retired Keyshawn Johnson? No shot at Canton. Has stats sufficient to be discussed, but zero chance of getting in. Still, I wonder if the Gimme the Damn Ball! author's next book will be titled, Gimme the Damn Hall!

     Welterweight Zab Judah had his father sit in for him on a conference call and pretend to be him. That's OK by me. With so many athletes either dull or surly, why not give their Dads a try?

     Check out this video if you don't mind the preceding 15-second commercial. Not every day you hear about a pit bull on Viagra.

Aaamichael      Finally, Michael Jackson is being paid $10 million to appear -- not sing, just mingle -- at a birthday party for 25-year-old Prince Azim of Brunei. Must go now. Am overcome by a wave of infinite sadness and have begun to weep.