March 26, 2023
ASTEROID MEASUREMENT-UNIT UPDATE
Giant 'city killer' asteroid to fly by Earth TOMORROW - and it's bigger than 4,000 buses
(Thanks to John Lobert)
Posted by Dave on March 26, 2023 at 09:42 PM
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GUESS WHERE THIS PLANT IS LOCATED
(Thanks to Matt Filar)
Posted by Dave on March 26, 2023 at 09:22 AM
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WE'RE GUESSING IT'S DRUGS
How jumping spiders became the new ‘it’ pets
(Thanks to Woozy Barnes)
Posted by Dave on March 26, 2023 at 09:20 AM
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HEY, CAT PEOPLE:
You have some explaining to do.
(Thanks to John Lobert)
Posted by Dave on March 26, 2023 at 09:18 AM
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'INTERTWINING THEIR GIANT PENISES'
David Attenborough’s Wild Isles shocks viewers with graphic slug sex scene
(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)
Posted by Dave on March 26, 2023 at 08:03 AM
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WE STAND WITH BERLIN
Berlin welcomes topless female swimmers in victory for activists
(Thanks to Carlos Montage)
Posted by Dave on March 26, 2023 at 06:56 AM
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CANADA: A NATION GRIPPED BY TERROR
B.C. family comes home from vacation to find a goat has moved in
(Thanks to Doug Ogg)
Posted by Dave on March 26, 2023 at 06:02 AM
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SO SCIENTISTS ARE ALSO DOING THIS?
Beetles suck water into their butts to stay hydrated, and now scientists know how
(Thanks to Ralph)
Posted by Dave on March 26, 2023 at 05:52 AM
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March 25, 2023
IS THERE ANYTHING THAT *ISN'T* OUR FAULT?
French blame 'Americanisation' of baking bread for causing farting epidemic
(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 04:01 PM
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NOBEL PRIZE ALERT
(Thanks to Annette)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 03:56 PM
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THERE'S AN OINTMENT FOR THAT
What's That Big White Splotch on Uranus?
(Thanks to Jay Brandes)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 03:51 PM
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ATTENTION ALL HANDS: PEE OVER THE SIDE
(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 11:41 AM
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NOBODY IN AUSTRALIA SHOULD TOUCH OR EVEN APPROACH *ANYTHING*
Australians warned not to touch or even approach the poisonous Dendrocnide moroides trees there
(Thanks to Matt Filar and Rick Day)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 11:37 AM
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IN THAT CASE, SIR, HERE'S A TREAT AND YOU ARE FREE TO GO
Man tells deputies his name is ‘Dog’ and barks during traffic stop, Florida cops say
(Thanks to Doug in Sacramento)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 11:35 AM
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THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED
Potatoes are better than human blood for making space concrete bricks, scientists say
(Thanks to Mordechai Michael Schmutter)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:35 AM
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MAYONNAISE: FOOD OF LOVE
(Thanks to Jane Linderman)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:34 AM
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NEXT LEVEL OF *WHAT*?
Designs To Take Your Nails To The Next Level
(Thanks to John Lobert)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:30 AM
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WE WERE PROMISED FLYING CARS
You Can Now Order a Starbucks Drink Based on Your Zodiac Sign
(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:28 AM
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ASTEROID MEASUREMENT-UNIT UPDATE
Asteroid the size of 22 tuna fish to fly closer to Earth than the Moon
(Thanks to John Grant and Maryann)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:27 AM
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PAGING LES NESSMAN
Nevada church to have 10K Easter eggs dropped from helicopter
(Thanks to Mike in Dayton)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:25 AM
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CUBA, KANSAS: CITY OF EXCITEMENT
(Thanks to Dave Vander Ark)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:21 AM
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None of YOUR business
(Thanks to Peter Metrinko, who says "It's snot for me to say.")
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:19 AM
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UP TO THAT POINT IT WAS A FUN EXPERIENCE
Tourist survives bungee jump fall in Thailand after cord snaps
(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:16 AM
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THE ENVELOPE PLEASE...
'Not the most attractive': Underdog snail wins Mollusc of the Year
(Thanks to klezmerphan)
Posted by Dave on March 25, 2023 at 09:13 AM
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March 24, 2023
A BLOW FOR JUSTICE
Farting Lawyer Wins $170K Over Being Refused Permission to Work From Home
(Thanks to Annette)
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 09:27 AM
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WE SAW THREE LOOSE MEERKATS OPEN FOR THE KINGSTON TRIO
Three meerkats on the loose in Netherlands town
(Thanks to John Lobert)
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 09:24 AM
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DEFFANITELY
Are we growing more dumber? Americans’ IQ scores drop in four of five measurements
(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 09:22 AM
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MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY
1:21 p.m. A man who had previously shoplifted, did not shoplift today.
8:18 p.m. A man kept approaching passersby and letting them know he was a murderer.
(Thanks to Roberto)
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 09:20 AM
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EVEN IF WE PLAY FLIGHT SIMULATOR?
Think you can land a plane in an emergency? Pilots explain why you can’t.
Unsurprising: Almost half of the men who responded were confident they could do it, compared with 20 percent of the women.
(Thanks to Steve K., who says “I guarantee I could get it on the ground.”)
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 09:14 AM
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NEXT STOP: WASHINGTON
South Carolina's top accountant to resign after $3.5B error
(Thanks to Barry Nester)
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 09:08 AM
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UNCLEAR ON THE CONCEPT
(Thanks to Barry Nester, who says “Everybody makes mistakes.”)
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 09:06 AM
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‘HOW WAS SCHOOL TODAY, DEAR?’
(Thanks to Robert Moats)
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 09:03 AM
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A HERO FOR OUR TIMES
(Thanks to John Lobert and Ralph)
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 09:00 AM
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IT’S ABOUT DAMN TIME
Oregon baseball team unveils new uniforms paying homage to exploding whale
Posted by Dave on March 24, 2023 at 08:54 AM
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March 23, 2023
ASTEROID-MEASUREMENT-UNIT UPDATE
Huge asteroid the size of London's Big Ben will get closer to Earth than the MOON on Saturday
(Thanks to Emily, Leslie and w)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 11:04 AM
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SO YOU'RE SAYING IT HAS FEET?
Lab-grown chicken is one step closer to being sold in the US
(Thanks to Ronald Troyer, who says "No.")
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 11:02 AM
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KIND OF LIKE WHEN EXPLORERS DISCOVERED THE TOMB OF TUTANKHAMUN, EXCEPT... IT'S A CONVERSATION PIT
Homeowners discover pink 1970s ‘conversation pit’ hidden under their floors, and TikTok is obsessed
(Thanks to Robert Moats)
TikTok is easily obsessed.
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 11:00 AM
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CANADA SINKS EVER DEEPER INTO CHAOS
(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 10:56 AM
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FINALLY, SOME GOOD NEWS
An Ozarks church leader claims prayer regrew a woman's toes.
For you skeptics: A website urging anyone with proof to share it has popped up at ShowMeTheToes.com.
(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 09:38 AM
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YOU KNOW WHO’S RUNNING THE SHOW
Feral Pigs Are Casually Destroying the Country. No One Can Stop Them.
(Thanks to Robert Moats)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 09:34 AM
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WHAT’S THAT SMELL?
I have a 55-inch butt — I use it to smuggle booze into bars
(Thanks to Michael Parry and Doug Ogg)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 09:31 AM
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WE KNOW WHERE THIS DRIVER WAS HEADED
Suspected impaired driver crashes into impaired driver sign
(Thanks to Jane Linderman and Gregory Snow)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 09:30 AM
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THIS IS WHAT YOUR DOG IS BARKING AT
(Thanks to many people)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 09:28 AM
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BUT THEY HAVE TROUBLE ARTICULATING THEM
Even worms make complex decisions
(Thanks to EricY, who says “FedEx them overnight to Washington.”)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 09:22 AM
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WE WERE PROMISED FLYING CARS
Video shows couch fly through the San Francisco sky
(Thanks to Al Barkafski and vee, who says “Auntie Em! Auntie Em!”)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 09:20 AM
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WE’RE GONNA NEED MORE CHEESE
Overturned truck spills 10,000 wine bottles onto California highway
(Thanks to Rick Day)
Posted by Dave on March 23, 2023 at 09:18 AM
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March 22, 2023
WE MIGHT AS WELL JUST SHRED THE BILL OF RIGHTS
California bill would ban the sale of Skittles
(Thanks to vee)
Posted by Dave on March 22, 2023 at 10:01 AM
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SEND THIS SMELL TO WASHINGTON
Disgusting sewer smell drives Senate to abandon debates
(Thanks to Ralph)
You probably can't read the article. But you don't need to read the article.
Posted by Dave on March 22, 2023 at 09:59 AM
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NEVER, EVER, RELAX IN A HOT TUB
Mountain lion attacks man from behind while he and his wife relaxed in hot tub
(Thanks to Robert Moats)
Posted by Dave on March 22, 2023 at 08:49 AM
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WE CAN NOW RETIRE THE NOBEL PRIZE
(Thanks to John Lobert)
Posted by Dave on March 22, 2023 at 08:45 AM
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