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February 03, 2025

FRANCE ON HIGH ALERT

FDA escalates Walmart broccoli recall to highest threat level

(Thanks to EricY)

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DEFCON V?

André René Roussimoff says you are not only a pansy, but really a stupid, sick pantywaist for eating broccoli from a UPC code of "6 81131 32884 5" bag of the prepackaged escargot-like stuff.

Canada says their pansy's aren't afraid of dying amidst the total chaos created upon hearing this news, but will remain sheltered in place for the long term. The nation's alert level has been raised to escargot-like.

Awaiting expected impact to the Doomsday Clock and the implementation of Dimwitted Stupid Time.

Threat Level "Plaid"?

I recommend that all kale be burned as an added precaution.

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