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December 26, 2024

IT'S TIME WE KNEW

What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?

(Thanks to Doug in Sacramento and Ralph)

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Morons all . . .
still missing nursecindy

If you ask my father, he would say definitely my head. I should ask for a second opinion. He's a plumber and sort of an expert at sh*t getting stuck in small pipes as he deals with that everyday.

The list goes on...

XYLOPHONE MALLET
FOAM BALL
12-INCH RATCHET EXTENDER, "DOESN'T KNOW WHY"
CYLINDRICAL WOODEN BLOCK
COOKING SPRAY
DAVID MUIR

"...accidentally dropped her on a hot dog cooker"?

I don't think even nursecindy heard that one.

Moron.

"Patient states he tripped in the shower and fell backwards and landed on a shampoo bottle..."

Now that one nursecindy heard nearly every day in the ER.

Nothing useful came out of it then? The rectum that is.

I was hoping for a Lamborghini.

Is this going to be like "12 Days of Christmas" where someone totals up the cost of all the items?

Merry after-Christmas everyone! And I too still miss nursecindy.

Is this Dave's annual Rear In Review column?

Alcohol seems to be a recurring variable & New Years Eve is just around the corner.

Bottoms up!

This is the year-end list of the year, clearly.

It was a one-in-a-million shot, Doc.

I still have a just-out-of-warranty color TV up there from the early 1980s.

Rejected Hallmark Christmas movies:

"The Enchanted Mistletoe Rectum"

"The Boffin and the Holiday Rectum"

"The Miracle of the Christmas Tree Rectum"

"Love and the Rectum Christmas Presents"

Insert joke here.

{"Uranus in retrograde" means that the planet Uranus is appearing to move backwards in its orbit from Earth's perspective, which astrologically signifies a period of introspection, re-evaluation of established patterns, and potential sudden shifts or disruptions related to change, freedom, and rebellion, as Uranus is associated with these themes; essentially, a time to examine and potentially restructure aspects of your life that might need a radical overhaul to align with your authentic self.} This message has been approved by Uranus in retrograde

Rectum? Darn near killed 'em!


1) And they say good journalism is no long written.

2) I'm pretty sure half those entries are from the angry ladies on The View.

3) Ouch

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