Dave Barry's Blog

WHO NEEDS COLLEGE, PART 2,038

How to Make $100 an Hour Scratching Someone’s Back

(Thanks to Steve K.)

WHEN FLIPPER GOES BAD

Traces of fentanyl and other drugs found in bottlenose dolphins in Gulf of Mexico

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

AND IN SPORTS

Ohio golf course offers fresh underpants, wipes and shorts for any golfer who poops themselves

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

THEY ARE NATURAL ENEMIES

Bear steals inflatable Grinch from Florida home

(Thanks to John Lobert, who notes that "the bear was released after producing etc.")

LOOKING FOR A GIFT FOR THE OUTDOORSPERSON ON YOUR HOLIDAY LIST?

Look no further.

(Thanks to John Lobert, who says "Wait until the bears find out about this!")

WE ASSUME THEY'RE USING FLORIDA DRIVERS' LICENSES FOR ID

Former SoCal candidate is accused of registering cartoon cats to vote.

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

WE THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME

After years on the rise, ‘All I Want for Christmas Is You’ listenership is slipping

(Thanks to EricY, who says "Hallellujah!")

WE NEED MARSHMALLOWS AND GRAHAM CRACKERS *STAT*

Traffic chaos caused by 30K pounds of melted chocolate on Bay Area highway

(Thanks to Pirateboy)

BUT DID SHE CONFESS?

Italian police arrest nun over links to mafia

(Thanks to Barry Nester and Al Barkafski)

FIRE UP THE BARBIE

Australians urged to eat invasive species — including feral cats

(Thanks to Ralph)