Dave Barry's Blog

YOU WILL NEVER GUESS WHERE

Massive python swings out at woman while she’s opening her garage: heart-stopping video

(Thanks to John Lobert)

JUST A BEER FOR US, THANKS

Japan launches drinkable mayo for fans that just can’t get enough

(Thanks to Charles Cates)

SOON WE WILL HAVE NO HUMAN RIGHTS LEFT

Possessing Harry Potter’s Sword of Godric Gryffindor is now illegal in Japan

(Thanks to Ralph)

AND IN SPORTS

Chad Ochocinco Says He Soaked Ankles in Teammates' Urine to Avoid Injuries

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston, who says "This helps in avoiding political discussions at Thanksgiving as well.")

NEARLY A TWO-DAY SUPPLY

4-year-old hacks mom’s Amazon Prime account and orders 51 boxes of SpongeBob SquarePants Popsicles

(Thanks to Matt Filar) 

THIS IS WHY YOU SHOULD HOLD ON TO EVERY BANANA

NYC fruit vendor, 74, who sold banana devastated after it became viral $6.2M artwork: ‘I am a poor man'

(Thanks to pharmaross)

WE SAW D.C.H.S.T. OPEN FOR E.L.O.

Dangerous College Honey Sex Trend Alarms Health Experts

(Thanks to Charles Cates)

MIAMI: CITY WITH A PASSION FOR ART

Couple caught having ‘loud sex’ atop a huge elephant sculpture ahead of Art Basel in Miami Beach

(Thanks to EricY and pharmaross)

WE BLAME GLOBAL CLIMATE CHANGE

Raw meat rains on McDonald’s drive-thru customer’s car windshield — theories swirl to explain why

(Thanks to pharmaross)

WHAT'S THAT SMELL?

Orcas start wearing dead salmon hats again after ditching the trend for 37 years

(Thanks to Ralph, pharmaross, Unholy Slacker and MOTW)