Dave Barry's Blog

SO, NO VEGANS

Brain surgeon claims he went to heaven during coma and it 'smells like fried chicken'

(Thanks to Annette)

IN THAT CASE, SIR...

"I have to poop": TPD says bathroom emergency the excuse for driver caught going 123 mph

(Thanks to Stan Ruth, who says "I'll have to remember that as an excuse.")

CRIMINAL MASTERMIND OF THE WEEK SO FAR, FLORIDA DIVISION

'No, you can’t get out': Florida burglary suspect caught in car by owner

(Thanks to EricY)

SINCE THERE WAS A MEAL, WE ASSUME THIS WAS IN FIRST CLASS

Airplane forced to land after mouse jumps out of passenger’s meal

(Thanks to pharmaross, Joe in Japan, Doug Ogg, Jay Brandes, Rick Day and Mezrap, who says "This is why we need snakes on our planes.")

TERRORISM UPDATE

Squirrel knocks out power for 3K customers in Jackson

(Thanks to Geoffrey Scott, who notes that the story says the squirrel "will not be causing any further power outages.")

ANY DAY NOW

Alef’s flying electric car nears production with 3,200 pre-orders

(Thanks to Ron Wylie)

FRANCE ON HIGH ALERT

A Runaway Capybara Is Evading Capture and ‘Living Her Best Life’ in England

(Thanks to Dave Vander Ark, who says "I saw Runaway Capybara open for The Hollies.")

STAND TALL.... SOUTH DAKOTA?

Sex-crazed seniors are responsible for an ‘alarming’ STI epidemic — here are the horniest states

(Thanks to pharmaross and Doug Ogg)

YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHO'S NUMBER ONE

The 5 most rat-infested cities in America revealed

(Thanks to Al Barkfski)

TODAY IN GOBSMACKERY

‘Meeting a real-life cyborg was gobsmacking’

(Thanks to Mezrap)

YOU KNOW IT'S SCIENTIFIC, BECAUSE IT HAS 'GAINED SIGNIFICANT TRACTION'

TikTok Users Are Eating Dirt In Viral Beauty Trend, Claim It Has Health Benefits

(Thanks to Ralph)