Dave Barry's Blog

HOLD OFF ON THAT MORTGAGE PAYMENT

The Last Day Of Life On Earth Has Been Calculated By NASA, This Is How Long We Have Left

(Thanks to Rick Day)

'IT'S REALLY ROCKING MY MIND THAT I AM FULLY INTRODUCING A NEW BODILY FUNCTION AT 26 YEARS OLD'

People are getting Botox in their necks to unlock a new bodily function: burping

(Thanks to MOTW)

'WHAT THAT PROBABLY MEANS IS THAT PEOPLE ARE PEEING IN THE WATER'

Labor Day leaves Colorado river polluted with painkillers and cocaine

(Thanks to Ron Wylie, who says "Think of the fish, dude.")

OTHER THAN THAT IT WAS A LOVELY MEAL

Car crashes through Arizona home as couple was about to sit for dinner

(Thanks to EricY)

NOOOOOOOOOOOO

Pumpkin spice hair trend 'huge for autumn' – and it's great for all skin tones

(Thanks to John Lobert, who says "Please make it stop.")

PAGING SIGOURNEY WEAVER

Astronaut reports strange sounds coming from troubled Starliner. Here's NASA's explanation

(Thanks to The Perts)

PEOPLE HAVE A LOT OF SPARE TIME

Here’s Why People Are Putting Toy Sharks On Chevy Windshields

(Thanks to The Perts)

MUST BE A PRIME MEMBER

Man Receives Pressure Cooker From Amazon 2 Years After Cancelling Order

(Thanks to Ralph)