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July 09, 2024


Officers found four hamsters in his pants.

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

They were consenting hamsters.


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a man with long hair wearing leopard-print pajamas .. the suspect was identified as Michael Pancake

He was flat as a .. ahem .. when they found the four hamsters in his pants.

Well, you can knock me down, step in my face
Slander my name all over the place
Do anything that you want to do
But uh-uh honey, lay off of my pants
Don't you step on my leopard-print pajamas
You can do anything but lay off of my leopard-print pajamas
Now let's go cats, uhh hamsters

As much as you would like to blame him, you know who you are, Michael Pancake was not the inspiration for this classic. He is innocent, innocent I tell you.

Didn't Judy Tenuta sing " Party in Your Pants " ?

... and WHY the officers left them there in the first place, we'll never know.

Was he wearing leopard-print PJ's to scare away the elephants?


In my defense, they didn't find the gerbils.

You'd think it'd have been a snake they'd have found there.

They were very happy to see him, and vice versa.

What, no crabs?

The Four Hamsters? Did John Hamm start a barbershop quartet?

Hamsters? How old fashioned.

Is he an heir to the IHOP fortune?

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