Dave Barry's Blog

YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO

It's National Pina Colada Day.

(Thanks to MOTW)

THE SLIM JIMS SHOW NO SIGN OF AGING

3,500-year-old rest stop — with leftovers from communal meals — found in Azerbaijan

(Thanks to The Fourth George)

HE BELIEVED THIS WOULD 'NEUTRALIZE THE VENOM'

Indian railway worker gets bitten by snake, bites back

(Thanks to Barry Nester, who says "Send this man to Australia.")

WE MIGHT AS WELL SHRED THE SO-CALLED 'BILL OF RIGHTS'

A LITTLE TEQUILA UP THE BUTT WILL GET YOU ARRESTED!!!

(Thanks to Joe in Japan)

DERHOPPINCRITTERBEENCAUGHTEN

Kangaroo captured after half a year on the loose in Germany

(Thanks to John Lobert, who says "France cancels high alert.")

ANYTHING TO DECLARE?

Man stopped at customs with 100 live snakes down his pants

(Thanks to The Perts and James Fitzwilliam)

ROLE MODEL OF THE WEEK SO FAR

JONESBORO, Ark. (KAIT) - A woman visiting her son in the Craighead County Juvenile Detention Center ended up facing misdemeanor charges herself after sheriff’s deputies said she broke the glass out of a cancer fundraising candy machine and stole several handfuls.

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

READY ONCE AGAIN TO FIGHT FOR YOU

Lawyer who defecated in Pringles can reinstated

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

'SUPERFAN' IS ONE WAY TO DESCRIBE HIM

Wawa superfan collects full set of order slips, 0-999

(Thanks to John Lobert, who says "Wawa has superfans?")

SPOILER ALERT: IT WAS KEITH RICHARDS

We Finally Know What Turned on The Lights at The Dawn of Time

(Thanks to Rod Nunley)

CANADA: A NATION ON THE EDGE OF THE BRINK OF THE PRECIPICE

‘Perfect rat storm’: Ontario cities seek ways to fight increasingly visible rats

(Thanks to B&C)

Increasingly Visible Rats WBAGNFARB.

HOW CLOSE ARE WE TO FLYING CARS?

We are this close.

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

Update: There's also this.

(Thanks to EricY, The Perts and Nelson from Michigan)

WE BET THOSE ARE SOME TICKED-OFF SNAKES

Brazilian biologist steps on venomous snakes 40,000 times for study

(Thanks to Rick Day)