Dave Barry's Blog

AHOY, DUDES

Boaters find over $1 million of cocaine — packaged with bald eagle designs — floating at sea off Florida Keys

(Thanks to EricY)

BROOKLYN: THE AUSTRALIA OF BOROUGHS

Man bitten by baby corn snake he found in bathtub in Brooklyn apartment

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

AGAIN: BEARS ARE BASICALLY LARGE SQUIRRELS

Thieving bear steals workers' lunch from pickup truck in California

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias, who says the message to the Uber Eats driver would be "I'm the guy that is just past the bear.")

ALWAYS THE LAST PLACE YOU LOOK

Microplastics discovered in human penises for the first time

(Thanks to EricY to James Fitzwilliam)