Dave Barry's Blog

WE'VE ALL WANTED TO

Man hurling fish, carrots inside Lincoln DMV caused $9,000 in damage, police say

(Thanks to Ralph)

AND IN MOTOR SPORTS

Vroomba, the world’s fastest vacuum, reaches speed of over 55 km/h

(Thanks to Roberto)

THEY SHOULD CHAIN IT TO SOMETHING HEAVY

It looks like someone tried to steal Graceland

(Thanks to Steve K., who says "They're gonna need a bigger truck.")

DINING REPORT

Last night this blog dined at popular new Mexican restaurant in Coral Gables. The food was excellent, as were the margaritas. However there was one section of the menu that we found deeply troubling:

There are not enough margaritas in the WORLD.

HARD PASS

Suburban brewpub goes all in on Chicago cicada craze with ‘Cicada-infused Malört'

(Thanks to Rodney Bertelsen)

"Cicada craze?"

ALWAYS THE LAST PLACE YOU LOOK

Man finds huge 30,000-year-old mammoth bones in his wine cellar

(Thanks to Alkali Bill)

DON'T TELL THE HIGHWAY DEPARTMENT

Ultra-rare fish, almost never seen by humans, washes up on Oregon coast for first time

(Thanks to pharmaross)

YOU COULD GET STONED OUT OF YOUR GOURD

1,400 packages of meth weighing almost 6 tons, worth $18M found in squash shipment

(Thanks to Ron T)

GOD HELP THEM IF A SQUIRREL SNEAKS ON BOARD

Bark Air, a new airline for dogs, set to take its first flight

(Thanks to The Perts and Barry Nester)

THIS IS WHY WE NEED STRICT FEDERAL CONTROLS

Woman Arrested For Battering Man. With A Cinnamon Roll.

(Thanks to Ron T. and Barry Nester)