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February 26, 2024

AND IN SPORTS

A mother has had her $820,000 insurance claim dismissed by a court in Ireland after a picture emerged of her winning a contest to see who could toss a tree the farthest.

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

DEPARTMENT OF EMAILS TO THE BLOG THAT WE DID NOT FINISH READING

Hello There,
Hope you are having a great day at work.

LOOKING FOR A SPECIAL GIFT FOR MOTHER'S DAY?

Your search is over.

(Thanks to Ralph)

WE THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME

You can now play Doom on your lawnmower.

(Thanks to Ralph)

THEN IT PEED ON THE RESEARCHERS' SHOES

Researchers taught a robot dog to open a door with its leg

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

OH SHUT UP

Is Toilet Paper Bad For The Climate?

(Thanks to Ron T)

February 25, 2024

THE SCIENCE IS (HIC) SETTLED

The aim of this study was to investigate the influence of the combination and order of beer and wine consumption on hangover intensity.

(Thanks to this blog's college roomie, Dr. Robert Stavis, with whom this blog conducted a great deal of field research on this topic Back in the Day.) 

AND IN CANADIAN SPORTS

The Vancouver Canucks Green Men Made A Triumphant Return

(Thanks to EricY, who says "I can now resume living again.")

HOW VERY GENEROUS OF THE INVASIVE JORŌ SPIDER

Invasive Jorō spider is surprisingly tolerant of busy urban settings, according to new study

(Thanks to EricY and Ron T)

THAT EXPLAINS THE PUNCHBOWL INCIDENT

If Alcohol Ever Makes You Poop Weird, Experts Say This Is The Reason Why

(Thanks to EricY)

WERE WE PROMISED FOLDING CARS?

Israeli developed folding car could change urban driving

(Thanks to Mezrap, Ron T and Barry Nester)

WHAT, THIS HORSE, OFFICERS?

Man caught leading stolen horse up staircase of apartment block in Poland

(Thanks to Ralph)

FESTIVE!

Blackpool Zoo collecting glittery female elephant poo to determine pregnancy

(Thanks to Ralph)

February 24, 2024

STAND TALL, KARBI COMMUNITY

721 members of India's Karbi community walk on stilts for world record

(Thanks to John Lobert)

AND IN FLORIDA SPORTS

Florida Man Games sees tank-topped teams evade police and wrestle over beer

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

OF COURSE THAT'S WHAT THEY WANT US TO BELIEVE

No, pinecones with tiny cameras inside aren’t being placed around Monroe County (we don’t think)

(Thanks to Ralph, who says "You know who is behind this.")

February 23, 2024

WE HARDLY RECOGNIZE THIS COUNTRY ANY MORE

West Virginia’s last Hooters is being torn down. Locals are planning a candlelit vigil.

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

AND IN SPORTS

“A lot of the rhetoric is confirmation that the pants are see-through.”

(Thanks to Ron T) 

INCREDIBLY, IT'S NOT BAGIPES

Musical Instrument Banned For Causing Dizziness And Even Death

(Thanks to Rick Day)

AUSTRALIA SAYS 'HOLD MY BEER'

Snake discovery as explorers identify new species of anaconda that's the 'biggest of all'

(Thanks to Ron T)

IN MIAMI WE CALL THIS AN EMERGENCY KIT

Police search a car and find cocaine -- and a US Army rocket launcher

(Thanks to MOTW)

A FLAGRANT VIOLATION OF THE CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT TO ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT SHRIMP

Red Lobster makes change to all-you-can-eat deal after customers ate so much the restaurant suffered huge losses

(Thanks to Al Barkafski, who blames Homer Simpson)

WELL *SOME* OF THEM, DEFINITELY

Is it time to revolutionize the toilet?

(Thanks to Mike Ricciardi and Ron T)

February 22, 2024

THEY FINALLY RAN OUT OF BEER

Japan's 'naked man festival' ends after more than 1,000 years

(Thanks to John Lobert)

SERIOUSLY?

We all enjoyed a packet of raisins as a lunchbox snack as kids, but do you know what they're made from? Some people have only just found out - and it's left them baffled

(Thanks to Rick Day)

Wait 'til they find out that ice is actually frozen water.

TODAY IN GOBSMACKERY

Waitress gobsmacked after man leaves drugs as tip for outstanding service

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

PARTY!

Coors Light truck crashes into Popeyes restaurant in Brooklyn

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

AND IN SPORTS

Kansas fisherman's crappie record removed after steel weights are found in fish's stomach

(Thanks to Ron T)

HARD PASS

Pork flavored coffee is Starbucks’ newest China pitch

(Thanks to Ralph)

February 21, 2024

WE CAN THINK OF NOBODY MORE QUALIFIED

‘El Chapo’s’ granddaughter, 18, joins hunt for Loch Ness Monster while romping through Scotland

(Thanks to Alkali Bill)

HEARTLAND SOCIAL NOTE

An Ohio couple held their wedding in an unusual venue: a Kentucky gas station's viral "disco bathroom."

(Thanks to John Lobert, who asks "What's that smell?")

NOTE: We may have blogged this item already, but we thought it was too important to take any chances. As a precautionary measure, judi has been fired.

HE DOESN'T SOUND *THAT* WILD

Woman Has Spent Months Sharing Her Toilet With A Wild Frog Named Stanley

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

NO, BUT THANKS FOR ASKING

Is it time for a more subtle view on the ultimate taboo: cannibalism?

(Thanks to Roberto)

SQUIRREL TERRORISM UPDATE

They've taken over The Washington Post.

Also the the little furred bastards are using a paywall.

(Thanks to Debbie in the Hague, Not My Usual Alias and Jeff from Pittsburgh)

AND YOU KNOW WHAT EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM PRODUCED

Florida doctors pull 150 live parasites from man’s nose

(Thanks to Ralph)

'GAZEBOED?'

Sloshed, plastered and gazeboed: why Britons have 546 words for drunkenness

(Thanks to Ralph)

THE WORD IS ‘HERO’

Minn. brewer sent flying across floor after beer tank valve explodes, blasting him with powerful stream of IPA

(Thanks to Mezrap)

WHAT IF THEY ESCAPE?

Lab-Grown Testicles Created In Male Fertility Breakthrough

(Thanks to Ron T, Al Barkafski, Michael Parry and Bill Hudgins, who says "Send them to Washington.")

ASTEROID MEASUREMENT-UNIT UPDATE

Asteroid the size of 6 peacocks to fly close to Earth on Thursday

(Thanks to Chuck)

February 20, 2024

LARGE SNAKES IN THE NEWS

Incredible moment world’s largest SNAKE is discovered by TV crew with 26ft beast as thick as a car tyre filmed in water

This Northern Green Anaconda was found by TV wildlife presenter Professor Freek Vonk in remote Brazil.

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

This blog has questions:

  • It's not in Australia?
  • "Freek Vonk?"
  • Why is "Freek Vonk" diving in what appears to be a dress shirt?

GUYS IN ACTION

Man modifies ride-on toy car to reach 92.24 mph

(Thanks to MOTW, who notes "Father's Day is coming.")

BETTER THAN CHEEZ-IT BRAIN

A psychologist has warned against scrolling on your phone and ending up with 'popcorn brain'.

(Thanks to Rick Day)

ALWAYS THE LAST PLACE YOU LOOK

Human leg found abandoned on New York Subway track

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

AS SO OFTEN HAPPENS

He got a box of penises in the mail, but not the ones he's looking for

(Thanks to Ralph)

AND IN SPORTS DOWN UNDER

Australian showjumper cleared to resume Olympic bid after ‘mankini’ controversy

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

BULLETIN BULLETIN BULLETIN

The fan who alleges they pooped their pants during the 2024 Hanteo Music Awards has made another shocking confession.

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

THEY LEFT THE OWNER IN THERE

Nebraska zoo extracts 70 coins from white alligator's stomach

(Thanks to Doug Ogg, Rick Day and The Perts)

WE'RE GONNA NEED MORE CEREAL

Truck spills 10,000 gallons of milk onto Massachusetts highway

(Thanks to MOTW, who says "Officials urged citizens not to cry.")

AND IN SPORTS

Cincinnati Reds Used Stuffed Pigs To Practice Tagging Runners

(Thanks to EricY, who says "Pork sliders?")

NOBEL PRIZE ALERT

Men and women's brains do work differently, scientists discover for first time

(Thanks to Mezrap and Al Barkafski, both of whom say "Duh," and Asher Scheiner, who says "Scientists discover fact known for thousands of years, probably because they never got any dates.")

 
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