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February 23, 2024

A FLAGRANT VIOLATION OF THE CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT TO ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT SHRIMP

Red Lobster makes change to all-you-can-eat deal after customers ate so much the restaurant suffered huge losses

(Thanks to Al Barkafski, who blames Homer Simpson)

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Close the bathrooms for cleaning between 6 and 10 pm. Problem solved.

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Red Lobster magic trick: Upon delivery of All-you-can-eat to the table, watch your waiter disappear.

They were almost bankrupted years ago when they offered all-you-can-eat popcorn shrimp and neglected to exclude their college town restaurants. The CEO said something to the effect of "I didn't realize students ate so much." Those who do not study history...

The ocean called. They're running out of shrimp.

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