Dave Barry's Blog

OBJECTION

Ohio attorney suspended for tossing poop-filled Pringles can

(Thanks to Gregory Snow, Charles Cates, GJ and Andrew Mendez, who says "I thought this was a free country.")

THANKS, BOFFINS

Daily Star victory as boffins concede it's fine to call them boffins – if the boffin likes it

(Thanks to Ralph)

YET WE NEVER COMPLAIN

Man flu is real after all as boffins conclude blokes 'suffer more' than women

(Thanks to Barry Nester and Al Barkafski)

NEWS YOU CAN USE

Our galaxy’s black hole spins fast and drags space-time with it, scientists say

(Thanks to The Perts and Ron T)

DON'T YOU HATE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS?

Drug Suspect Claims Someone Put Meth In His Underwear While He Slept

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner, Barry Nester and Frank)

'YOU HAVE ARRIVED AT YOUR DESTINATION'

Ancient murrelet diving bird confirmed on Chickamauga Lake is thousands of miles off course

(Thanks to Steve Bradford, who says "He was using Google Maps.")

WE'RE GUESSING WEED IS INVOLVED

Why do Dutch people wear pancakes on their heads on 29 November?

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

WE WERE PROMISED FLYING CARS

Smart Toilet Bursts into Flames as Someone Is Using It

(Thanks to Annette, Buck Nekkid and Ralph)

SO IT'S JUST MAC

Kraft’s newest Mac & Cheese is ditching cheese

(Thanks to vee)

IN THE RESTAURANT'S DEFENSE, SHE WAS NOT CHARGED EXTRA

A diner at N.Y. restaurant Chopt says her salad came with a finger in it

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, Jay Brandes, Charles Cates, EricY and Nelson from Michigan)

CANADA: A NATION GRIPPED BY TERROR

Loose pig ends up on Ontario highway

(Thanks to The Perts and John Lobert)