Dave Barry's Blog

TERRORISM IN WALES

Police issue warning as mysterious ‘Christmas gnomes’ appear in people’s gardens

(Thanks to MOTW and Robert Moats)

THANK GOD FOR RESEARCH

Heat can make you angry and even aggressive, research finds

(Thanks to Ed.)

'LET GO OF THE BATON!'

Dogs Perform Mozart With Orchestra

(Thanks to Michael Parry)

IN MANHATTAN NOBODY WOULD HAVE NOTICED

A Tesla stopped working and got stuck in the middle of a busy road for 9 hours because it couldn't be moved, report says

(Thanks to Rod Nunley, who says "So what's the flying version going to do?")

THERE IS NOTHING LEFT TO BELIEVE IN

Creature photographed in Loch Ness 'is not monster'

(Thanks to Barry Nester, who says "Of course not: it's Sasquatch!")

WHAT'S THAT SMELL WAFTING ACROSS THE ATLANTIC?

Expert shares how often you should wash towels with Brits admitting to washing them four times a year

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

WE WERE PROMISED FLYING CARS

U.S. SPY AGENCY DREAMS OF SURVEILLANCE UNDERWEAR IT’S CALLING “SMART EPANTS”

(Thanks to Mac)

AND IN SPORTS

Mexico Marathon disqualifies 11,000 of their 30,000 runners after finding THOUSANDS cheated, including using cars and public transport mid-race

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

CANADA: A NATION GRIPPED BY TERROR

OPP seek owner of goats that chased jogger in eastern Ontario

(Thanks to The Perts and B&C)

HE THOUGHT ANOTHER DRIVER WAS ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD

A suspected drunken driver accidentally called 911 on himself

(Thanks to B&C) 

THE FUTURE IS SMELLY

Jennifer Billock is a self-proclaimed 'cheese fortune teller' who performs the age-old practice of tyromancy, which is a means of divining the future by studying cheese

(Thanks to The Perts)

'KEEP YOUR TRUNKS ON'

Nude beach' sign at Loyola Beach a fake, alder says

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

SO HOW WAS YOUR FLIGHT?

Delta Air Lines U-Turn Emergency: “We Had Diarrhea All The Way Through The Airplane”

(Thanks to Annette, Barry Nester, Michael Parry, Al Barkafski, Asher Scheiner and doctorjly, who says "You're number 2 for landing.")

ALWAYS THE LAST PLACE YOU LOOK

New Zealand woman discovers surgical instrument ‘size of a dinner plate’ left in her body after operation

(Thanks to vee, EricY, Barry Nester and RonT)

IN THEIR DEFENSE, THEY NEEDED A SHORTCUT

Two people detained in China for allegedly damaging Great Wall with excavator

(Thanks to Steve K., B&C and EricY)

ASTEROID MEASUREMENT-UNIT UPDATE

Asteroid the size of 81 bulldogs to pass Earth on Wednesday

(Thanks to Matt Filar and Mary Smith)

Update Update: NASA announces an asteroid the size of a six-floor building is approaching Earth

(Thanks to EricY)

DEPARTMENT OF EMAILS TO THE BLOG THAT WE DID NOT FINISH READING

Hey,

I mailed you regarding an opportunity.

UPDATE

A woman said she was defending her mom during viral porta-potty brawl at Morgan Wallen's concert

Well in THAT case...

(Thanks to Robert Moats)