ALWAYS THE LAST PLACE YOU LOOK
Only 55 percent of men and women can confidently state where their rectum is located
(Thanks to pharmaross)
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January 20, 2023
TODAY IN GOBSMACKERY
Man left gobsmacked after neighbour builds wall one metre from his window while he's on holiday
(Thanks to pharmaross)
Woman gobsmacked when asked to split £720 dinner bill after hardly eating anything
(Thanks to Emily, Leslie and w)
WE CAN'T DECIDE IF THIS IS GOOD NEWS OR BAD NEWS
Supercomputer Says 27% of Life on Earth Will Be Dead by the End of This Century
(Thanks to Rod Nunley and Suzie Q Wacvet)
CLASSY!
Artist Creates Chandelier Earrings That Actually Light Up
(Thanks to Ralph)
AND IN... WELL, WE HOPE IT'S SPORTS
Johnson Comes Up Big, Dick Shrivels Late
(Thanks to pharmaross)
CSI: YOUNGSTOWN
Break-in at daycare possibly connected to recent toilet paper thefts
(Thanks to pharmaross, who says "At least police have something to go on.")
MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY
11:43 a.m. A woman requested help retrieving a blood-covered boom box from her car.
(Thanks to pharmaross)
AUSTRALIAAAAAA
Australia's 'Toadzilla': Record-breaking cane toad found in Queensland
(Thanks to Ralph, pharmaross, Jim Kenaston, Steve, wiredog and Alkali Bill)
THIS HAPPENS FAR TOO OFTEN
Miami Man Injured by Falling Iguana During Outdoor Yoga Class
(Thanks to Ralph and pharmaross)
AFTER THEY EMERGED THEY PRODUCED MUMMIFIED BUT VALID FLORIDA DRIVERS' LICENSES
10 Mummified Crocodiles Emerge From an Egyptian Tomb
(Thanks to Asher Scheiner and wiredog, who says "We need Brendan Fraser now!")
DEPARTMENT OF EMAILS TO THE BLOG THAT WE DID NOT FINISH READING
Good morning, Barry,
THIS COULD EXPLAIN THE EGG SHORTAGE
Why Egypt is asking its people to eat chicken feet
(Thanks to The Perts)
PSSST…. NEED EGGS?
Egg smuggling up 108% at the US-Mexico border as prices skyrocket
(Thanks to pharmaross)
AND IN FLORIDA SPORTS
North Fort Myers woman punts man in groin for not bringing her to Strip Club
(Thanks to pharmaross)
SOUNDS LEGIT
'Ghost of my dead dog is forcing my cat to constantly steal toys from child's grave'
(Thanks to Alan at Division)
COFFEE FOR US, THANKS
Chu-hi-cha – A Unique Type of Tea Brewed From Caterpillar Droppings
(Thanks to Emily, Leslie and w)