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December 01, 2022

THE ESCALATING EPIDEMIC OF GOBSMACKEDNESS CONTINUES TO ESCALATE

One woman was left gobsmacked after coming across a huge carrot while shopping in Devon

(Thanks to John Lobert)

Imagine being the Daily Mirror staffer who had to write this story. You go into journalism thinking you're going to change the world. You wind up with an editor telling you, "Freddie, a woman on the Internet bought a large carrot!"  

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The other story on that page "Dad with 'Santa-phobia' is 'terrified of putting up Christmas decorations'"

The guy is suffering from claus-trophobia.

Carrot. Just wait til the break out the story of the giant booger. Dave Barry reporting. Yes I am fully qualified report this story - I wrote the book on this subject. "Dave Barry here on the street reporting on a giant booger that this many sneezed out of his nose and immediately sucked it back in. Details tonight on the 10 pm news.

All I saw was the arm and hand of someone holding a huge carrot. I think we still need some verifiable proof of gobsmackedness. And no fuzzy photos either!

If she's gobamacked by the carrot, just wait until they break out the big stick!

Not to worry, the gerbils will make short work of it.

I think the Danish man *GOBSMACKED* more people after he took his giant "carrot" out.

I don't carrot all about this kind of "news."

But, dammit, inquiring minds want to know: did that carrot have a valid Florida driver's license????

@Ralph

I yam tired of your whining.

It's time to turnip the volume to drown out your complaints.

If we dug deeper into your psyche, we'd likely find you had a taro-bull childhood.

Obviously root vegetable humor doesn't float your boat cuz it leeks.

You sound like a square root.

Are you a complaining couch potato?

I like root vegetable jokes. You can't beet'em!

Just out of curiosity, what’s the radio of fruitcake Christmas gifts to general gobsmackedness in a given population?

Asking for a friend.

Better gobsmacked than befuddled.

" This word comes from Irish and Scottish Gaelic. It still pops up in other places in British slang – for example, “shut your gob!” If you say that you were “gobsmacked,” it means that you were so surprised or astonished, it was as though someone had smacked you in the mouth."

How about if a Florida python swallowed this carrot whole? It would make major ridicule on the DBblog. It's this kind of story that keeps the gears and wheels of this blog spinning. Onward to Pulitzer Prize 2022 - but first a refreshing glass of carrot juice.

Someone once hit me in the face with an ear of corn. I was cobbsmacked.

I once kicked someone in the groin and they was knobsacked & cracked.

Even worse: "Freddie! Someone's been gobsmacked!"

Dave Barry claimed he was gobsmacked
He got fired and was jobsmacked
He started a blog, and along with his dog
And now hosts nuts who are allwacked

I am working on that last line. Any suggestions?

@Captain11: "All wacked" is two words. Otherwise, perfect!

Thanks muchly to wanderer2575 for the very insightful suggestions. I have fussed over this since previous publication and would like a do over:

Dave Barry cried that he was gobsmacked
He got fired and he was job-sacked
He started a blog, and along with his dog
And now he hosts nuts who are all-whacked.

His work is all ghosted by Judi
He says that is her sole duty
But she has her eyes
On her own Pulitzer Prize
And he has his eyes on her booty

So rooty toot tooty
Let's hear it for Judi
Her prose is not dense
Or never past tense
She's just doing her dooty

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