Dave Barry's Blog

UPDATE

Deputies: Florida man stole $1,375 worth of toothbrushes, threw them off a bridge

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)

'ARTIST'

This artist is exhibiting a nightmarish display of intestines around the world

(Thanks to Nelson From Michigan)

WANT TO HEAR BETTER SONGS ON THE RADIO?

Leave the Earth.

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)

AND IN FUTURE SPORTS

Psychic lion predicts England vs France World Cup result

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

IMAGINE

A "very, very fancy" toilet which once belonged to Beatles legend John Lennon has been placed on show.

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

CREEPING FASCISM CREEPS INTO FLATHEAD COUNTY

1:02 p.m. An officer informed a homeowner that he could have, at most, seven chickens in his yard.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

APOCALYPSE UPDATE

A man claims he’s now making £22,000 a month by selling burps in a jar and a sending people his used socks.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

WELL IF THAT’S NOT AN EMERGENCY, WE DON’T KNOW WHAT IS

Emergency sirens activated after ant attack, police say

(Thanks to Kathy Conroy)

WHY ON EARTH NOT?

When a Hernando County man left a bar, he walked past a sheriff's office patrol vehicle and "decided he'd like to set it on fire," according to deputies.

(Thanks to S2per)

‘WHAT, THIS PYTHON, OFFICER?’

Stolen python slithers out of suspect’s jacket during arrest, Hamilton police say

(Thanks to B&C, who say “We don’t know why anyone would want to steal a python.”)

WE THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA

Booze ban, extra cops on commuter rails planned for SantaCon pub crawl

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)