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November 30, 2022


Drake gifts DJ Khaled $20K toilets for birthday: ‘This is not no regular bowl’

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)


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Those high-tech Japanese toilets get me every time I try to use one in a public restroom here in Japan. Apparently I do not behave the way the toilet expects me to and it flushes before I have even started. (Those who remember Dave’s article in which he referenced a “Planet Wee Wee” will understand....)

I especially appreciate the "dry" cycle with those. I never splurge for the tire shine or hand buff, though. "A-hem; I have a theory...". Name the sketch.

It includes a built-in popup snake.

I saw Drake and DJ Khaled open for the Commodeadores.

Sounds like there was a pissing contest, I'm just not sure who got the toilet, the winner or the loser?

“This might be the best gift ever. Everybody knows, when you sit down and do the theory,” he said. “That’s when you meditate and reflect on life! When you sit down and do the theory, that’s when you reflect on life, ideas be coming. Some of my best ideas come from me taking a theory. Real talk! And I got one now that lights up, and it sprays theory, and it even makes it smell theory. And it’s like a big theory.”
~DJ Khaled

I really can't offer any comment because this is so well stated.

I always wondered why they would name a toilet after Dorothy's dog (in the Wizard of Oz). But then, as I was watching my dog drink out of the toilet, I understood.

Then there's THIS

@Mad Hatter: Dave Barry's 2003 Gift Guide: Dog Lamp ?

Another birthday present, gone to S _ _ _!

Remote control operation? How exactly are you going to pee or poo in it remotely?

Bidet. What a great name for an all-female rock group. But not a death metal singing group, I hope.

And it comes with a 10 minute timer so you don't have those dead buns from sitting too long. What about the redness, the red halo around the bum?

@Michael - LOL! “I have another theory.” “No, thank you...not today.” (Sound of machine gun fire and the program’s closing theme song.)

@Geez Louise - Great investigative skills! That was surprisingly close, but it was from an even more “informative” weekly article. (Fun fact: Louise is my middle name.)

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