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September 21, 2022

SEA OTTERS ARE BASICALLY LARGE AQUATIC SQUIRRELS

'Like a scary movie': Sea otter takes surfer's board in Santa Cruz

(Thanks to vee)

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Crime in California is really getting out of hand.

Either that, or squirrels are just land otters.

Either way, they otter be in pictures.

"Use the abalone-scented surf wax," they said. "It'll be awesome," they said.

The sea otter was later welcomed at Venice Beach where it set up camp with the tweakers cooking an early holiday batch of pumpkin spice meth. The sea otter, appearing to be 'smashed', garnered a tent from a guy with a few blackened teeth who proclaimed to be Poseidon then stole a bicycle and shopping cart. After pooping on the sidewalk and peeing on a long time resident retiree's front lawn strewn about trash was found in the area. Also many discarded small aluminum foil wrappers and a heavily used glass pipe were found in her yard.

In the otter's defense, he'd heard about Santa Bar Crawls and thought he needed a raft to go on the Santa Bar Cruise.

Snork @RidleySparrow

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