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August 11, 2022


Man who changed his name to 'Fire Exit' declares 'there's nobody more famous than me'

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)


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I beg to differ!

John Lennon once made a similar claim, but he had more to work with, and he didn't have to change his name.

He'll be front page news when the day comes that he's arrested for arson.

Ok, I have this to offer.

Many years ago I was visiting St. Louis and got together with a buddy for dinner. He suggested a 'great' barbecue place I had been to before and we agreed. So we arrived. The place was crowded so my friend left his name at the desk and sat waiting to be called for our table. After a short wait a young woman called out, "table for two for Christ."

My buddy goes, "Oh Jesus!" His last name is Crist.

How about Mr. Push ?

The other day, last week, my same buddy called me in the middle of the day while I was at work. He says, "gotta minute, I heard this story just now, my Nephew called my and told me this story.?"

I say, "yeah, go ahead."

He says, "my nephew said He just saw on the news where a really large woman and a really large man were at a swimming pool and the guy pooped all over her."

I say, "really?"

He says, "yeah, I just thought it was funny, I'm gonna let you go."

"Ok, bye."

This Chinese friend of mine isn’t famous, though her given name is Rongrong. When she married Paul Wright, in her case, two rongs made a Wright.

That's why "Wing Wong #1 Chicken" is never a good idea to name a Chinese restaurant featuring delivered take-out.

@ D. Paddy: I once lived near a Chinese drive through called Wok & Roll.

Ah, so close!

The most famous person is, in fact, named "Emergency Exit".

Speaking of famous people, what do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting in front of a door?


What do you call a man with no arms and no legs lying in a hole in the ground?


What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in the water?


Mr. U. R. Here is more popular in most shopping malls.

Mr. and Mrs. Exit
Live in an Exit house
They have Exit kids and an Exit dog
One day, they'll be grandparents and the kid will be called Grand Exit.

Nope. This guy took Bill Engvall's trademark line a bit too far.

Here's your sign


This reminds me of a gag that service folks stationed over in Germany would routinely play on newcomers when giving directions - "just get on the highway, and follow the signs to 'Ausfaurt'!" Ausfaurt just means 'exit'. :P

There was a similar one when we were in the French-speaking part of Belgium (though it probably works in multiple countries), "just follow the signs to 'Centrum'!". Centrum meaning the center of town, so they would keep coming back to the same place.

There is a story that an odd dude here in New Mexico once changed his name to Fire Exit. Then he fell in love with a cute Mexican witch who specialized in teaching pyrokinesis. The story ended badly when they both made ashes out of themselves.

That'll be a short-lived title once someone changes their name to Men's Room.

On the plus side, when he walks into a bar nobody asks him, "What's your sign?"

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