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August 05, 2022


We are aware that the blogsite is loading v-e-r-r-r-r-r-r-y slowly, and we are doing all we can to correct it. And by “doing all we can,” we mean “not actually doing anything, unless you count hoping that it gets better.” Also of course judi will be fired. 


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Actually there's nothing wrong with the blogsite's speed as it's just a perceptual illusion caused by the Earth's spinning so much faster than usual. Kind of like how everything seems to slow down in a crisis.

Williamshatnermonologueitis may be he cause.

The Blog is overheating due to global warming. As we near the peak of the '22 hurricane season, a few systems with significant storm surge are needed along the S.E. coast of Florida to cool down Dave's Flux Capacitor and bring the Blog back to normal operating speeds.

Here, in Europe, it seems to be slow because it is synchronizing with "outbrain.com"...

Will a significant storm surge in S.E. Florida cause Dave's Flux Capacitor to shrink?

Vewy, vewy swowy, & vewy, vewy annoiwing. A-th, A-the, that's all folks!

New Blog sponsor...

Even s-l-o-w-e-r Cantaloupe eyes you made me a life of ashes

Keeping in step with the new Blog theme...

And only a day after the blog warranty ran out.

More S-L-O-W...

Advice from Mrs. Blog to Dave...

Stop and smell the coffee. Does something about this smell funny to you?

I thought it was because of Dave's advancing age....

I'd suggest a virtual high colonic. All those butt hole blogs have caused a Net-backup, the servers need to be 'flushed'.

Thanks for trying to fix the Blog. This is all I could come up in my search for potential answers to fix the problem.

Wow the 'fix' owns your face off. Now, every once in a while when I comment the Blog shoots flames out the screen. The first time I showed my friends and they saw it happen they were like, "whoa you rule!" I managed to get a a rad Blog screen headshot and my computer started smoking and I was like this is Satan's Up and Running again Blog! At this point I know I am in love with it posting again. I tested the 100 word post limit protocol and it was putting out like new and improved 200 word limit, how sweet is that??? Thats like 100 extra words of pure power, which is I'm sure is totally upping my megahurts. Oh yeah and at least once a day this Blog will now make rad noises like an electric guitar wailing. If your hardcore, this Blog is for you.
Now, no problem at all. Now, everything shows up written in Chinese. I cant even believe how sweet this Blog is.

Oh, the Chinese is tops. If you had problems with it before its only because you don't even know what you are doing!!!!

Slow Satire

(NOT a partisan parody)

It ain't broken so don't fix it anymore.

It all began by a very old arthritic butterfly beating its wings too slowly in the Amazon rain forest.

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