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July 06, 2022

MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY

8:33 a.m. A teenager lied to both of his parents and snuck out to his girlfriend’s house.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

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10:03 p.m. A woman reported that while she was in a movie theater, someone moved her car over a few rows, but claims she had her key with her during the movie.

I hate when this happens to me. I can go into Walmart, come right back out, and my car is in a different row. The other day I thought it had been stolen but then I remembered I have a new car so I probably should look for that one instead.
I think Flathead County could benefit from some strong pharmaceuticals, iykwim.

Dammit Chloe! It's total chaos out there, form a perimeter stat!

9:16 p.m.--A shoeless man was sleeping in front of a doorway.

The man turned out to be Shoeless Wesley Ames, a local who had lost his house keys again after staying at the bar too long. In good weather he never wears shoes, in winter he wears galoshes. Wesley is rather odd even in Flathead County.

So how much did the guy's score improve after he switched to the baseball bat?

And somebody is mixed up on their understanding of the term "black tar".

One can imagine how the Flathead County Sheriff and Kalispell Police respond to the calls.

Kids! I don't know what's wrong with these kids today!

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