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June 07, 2022


...you need to pick a lane.

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)


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I can leave my driveway and can't make more than a couple of stop signs, come to a major 4 lane and see this. On any given day. Makes me wish it was 1870.

#8. Los Angeles, Los Angeles County

– Total population: 5,728 (#411 nationwide)
— Male population: 3,186
— Female population: 2,542
— Child population, ages 5-18: 1,629

If you live here, feel free to dream.

The look on the safety officer's face, "Are you kidding me?"

Well, he didn't want to go to Birmingham, and he didn't want to go to south London. He wanted to go to somewhere in between, so....

It looks like SOMEBODY was thinking outside the paradigm, and they want us to be critical of that?

A friend once did this - except his car ended up on top of the two guardrail runs (they were closer together). He didn't know what he hit (being drunk) so he opened his door and promptly fell the ground *splat*. He decided there was no way he would be able to get his car off of there without getting arrested so he walked home. The next morning there was a knock on his door, and the policeman (sheriff or whatever) said "I know you were drunk, but I can't prove it. Your car has been impounded."

When there's a fork in the road, take it.

He was fortunate that it didn't happen at the Schloessen Cut-off.

I hate it when that sudden dismount from the guard rail makes you drop your mobile phone in the middle of a text message.

I'll take my half out of the middle, thank you.

I would blame GPS. It gives me orders such as "turn left", but it doesn't say which left.
This left ->
Or that left <-

"Officer, this wasn't my fault. There should have been a big fork warning there was a fork in the road."

Three lefts make a right.

After I submitted this I drove to my dentist for a 6 month cleaning. I saw the aftermath of three car accidents, one of which puzzled me. An entrance ramp onto the interstate had a seriously crashed car on the shoulder, with the heavily damaged front end facing into the direction of traffic. Two men were with the car, looking puzzled themselves. However, the worst driving I saw was from one of my neighbors. I followed the car through the neighborhood and onto a busy four lane highway, and it was like watching a really drunk driver. No lane control, driving kind of slowly. The car made a turn in the neighborhood like the kind you might make the fisrt time you sat behind a wheel learning to drive. With trepidation I passed the car and it was just an ordinary middle aged person,seemingly sober. Well, it was 10 a.m. so I'm guessing they really were sober.

Peter M. - Here are some recent headlines from the online 'crime' source of Orange County CA where I live. It is maddening to live and drive around here.

Prius crashes into 8 parked cars in Orange; driver arrested

(Right near where I live, I frequent the crash scene unfortunately driving.)

Pickup slams into, destroys Orange house; driver suspected of DUI

(I drive by the what was the house all the time.)

Taft Elementary students in Santa Ana hit by car recovering with fractures and emotional scars

(And He meant it, too)

Police chase suspects from Brea to Riverside County after house burglary

(This close to the route O.J. took which is right by my house.)

Man on 405 Freeway bridge in Inglewood snarls traffic for hours

This is in Los Angeles. The paper called it I quote, "A Behavioral Incident." Bet you haven't had A Behavioral Incident where you live.

A truck crashes into her Anaheim living room and ‘everything goes flying’

(I did not make this up.)

Drivers of a Porsche, pickup are killed in separate collisions in Orange

(Unfortunately these two accidents occurred near the same time right by my house very close to the route I take to the bank and grocery store. I am always watchful for these types of 'Behavioral Incidents' when going to the bank or to the store to pick up a few things.)

I could go on, but you get the idea. Remember, you heard it here first. Look for it in your town:

'Behavioral Incident'

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