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May 21, 2022

THE FLATHEAD COUNTY DATING SCENE

5:08 p.m. A woman who tackled a man off of a scooter later told law enforcement they were not in a romantic relationship, but everything was okay.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

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From Barney Miller:

Mrs. Boyle: "Listen, what do you think of a man who hits his wife?"
Sgt. Philip Fish (Abe Vigoda): (beat) "You only hurt the one you love."

In her defense, she was just having a one time fling.

9:09 p.m. Annoyed with the long line at a drive through, a man tried to speed off and hit a tree.

The rest of the story:

The same man was chased out of a porta-potty at a construction site. Then he used the toilet at a convenience store and forgot his gun, which was missing when he returned. Then the road was closed because of some ducks. When he tried taking a nap in the park, the cops rousted him, thinking he was shot or something,
Then he was stuck in a long line trying to buy some food when this happened.

It's tough when you suffer from irritable bowel syndrome in Flathead County.

I think we should have a quick poll. Guys, do you take your gun out of the holster when using the john?

Bring back Kristi Burns.

Advice for cowboys - don't squat with yer spurs on. Gun stays in the holster though.

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