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April 23, 2022

SO WILL THE DOGS SLEEP IN THE HUMAN BEDS?

He and Yuki Kinoshita are behind Plufl, a new company launching with its dog beds for humans.

(Thanks to Ralph)

NOBEL PRIZE ALERT

Scientists Invent Device for Optimally Separating Oreos

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston and Tim Couch)

WE SAW HELPFUL SHRIMP OPEN FOR PHISH

Helpful Shrimp Cleans the Teeth of Diver

(Thanks to John Lobert)

AND IN SPORTS

GUY THROWS MARSHMALLOW OVER HOUSE, RUNS THROUGH HOUSE, CATCHES IT IN HIS MOUTH

(Thanks to John Lobert)

OF ALL THE THINGS YOU SHOULD AVOID CLICKING ON TODAY

This is the one you should avoid the most.

(Thanks to DaninDallas)

April 22, 2022

IT WAS ETC. AFTER ETC.

Police chase loose goat through Florida apartment complex

(Thanks to Ralph)

DO YOU APPRECIATE SIMPLE, ELEGANT DESIGN?

Then we're betting you will enjoy this.

AND IN SPORTS

Red Wings zamboni driver fired for peeing in drain launches lawsuit'

(Thanks to pharmaross)

NOBEL PRIZE ALERT

Pet psychic reveals 5 steps to talk to your dog - and it's easier than you think

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

DIDN'T THEY OPEN FOR THE WHO?

Jacinda Ardern greeted by giant sad dancing kiwifruit during visit to Japan

(Thanks to Doug Ogg and Alkali Bill)

AT LEAST IT'S NOT BEARS

Eagle Mountain residents cleaning up after tumbleweed invasion

(Thanks to EricY)

WE CANNOT KEEP UP

Hi Dave,

Recently featured as the first-ever Malaysian female on HYPEBEAST for her capsule collection. we would love to arrange an interview with you and the world's fastest-growing social media star MSPUIYI who at only 23 years old has over 17 MILLION Instagram followers, her own fashion collection, and two worldwide beauty lines.

WHERE'S THE FIRE, DUDE?

Clearwater marijuana dispensary catches fire, disrupts U.S. 19 traffic

(Thanks to James Flynn and Ralph)

HELLO, TERMINIX?

Family hears ‘odd rumbling’ coming from Tahoe home — and finds 5 bears hibernating

(Thanks to B'game, who says "And people worry about termites!")

MEANWHILE ABROAD

I have a urinal in my flat and it has changed my life – so why are people appalled?

(Thanks to Alkali Bill, who says "The Guardian tacking the issues of our time.")

April 21, 2022

IT BE THE PIRATE BRANCH, MATEY

Walmarrt? Store name misspelled on Hudson sign

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)

THE NEWS FROM GUAM

Unfortunately our strict policy prohibits us from bringing you The News from Guam.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

SO HOW WAS YOUR DAY?

Woman falls headfirst into vault toilet trying to retrieve cell phone

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins, Michael Moyer, B’game and Steve Lodholz)

OTHER THAN THAT, DUDE, IT WAS LIKE A FAIRY TALE

Wedding spirals into chaos after bride allegedly laced food with pot

(Thanks to GJ, pharmaross and Bill Hudgins)

Related-ish: 500 pounds of marijuana spill onto I-70 after crash on 4/20

(Thanks to man tom and pharmaross) 

WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

Thousands of genetically altered mice could be released on Nantucket by MIT scientists

(Thanks to Ann Farr)

We know what might drive them out.

IT WAS LOOKING FOR THE SMALL-RODENT SECTION

Ball python found 'chillin' on a shelf' at Indiana Walmart store

(Thanks to Ralph, pharmaross and Doug Ogg)

IT WAS AN 'ACCIDENT'

Doctors in Brazil remove 2kg dumbbell from man's rectum

(Thanks to pharmaross)

NOBEL PRIZE ALERT

The device uses a weak electrical current to transmit sodium ions from food, through the chopsticks, to the mouth where they create a sense of saltiness, said Miyashita.

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

FLATHEAD COUNTY TACKLES THE ISSUES

8:52 a.m. Someone wanted dispatch to stop Congress, and the Jehovah’s Witnesses.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

April 20, 2022

SOMETIMES WE GET THE FEELING THE WORLD HAS PASSED US BY

Hi Dave​​​​,

Would you like to speak to Rito Rhymes, Infotaining Rapper and Technology Designer, about his upcoming performance this weekend at Dogepalooza and his collaboration by Dogecoin Foundation?

TO PROTECT AND SERVE

Special award for deputy attacked by squirrel on camera

(Thanks to Ralph)

'I WANTED TO SHOW MY APPRECIATION'

Scientists name new species of millipede after Taylor Swift

(Thanks to Ralph)

OOPS

Man hands officers meth instead of registration at traffic stop

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)

TO BOLDLY GO

Probing Uranus Is Top Priority This Decade, U.S. Science Advisors Say

(Thanks to keith in tampa, Al Barkafski, Jay Brandes and MO Mitch, pharmaross and Jon)

DUDES

It's 4/20.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

April 19, 2022

LITERALLY STUCK IN TRAFFIC

Glue spill on Highway 92 approaching San Mateo-Hayward Bridge causes major traffic delay

Autoplay.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

IF YOU HAVE ANXIETY ABOUT VISITING THE DENTIST

...do not click here.

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

DEPARTMENT OF THINGS 'EXPERTS' HAVE BEEN REGULARLY PREDICTING FOR AT LEAST 100 YEARS

Flying cars and roads in the sky will be a big part of our future, according to experts.

(Thanks to pharmarfoss)

WHAT ODOR, OFFICER DUDES?

Woman with 229 pounds of weed in her car runs out of gas on I-55 Bridge, police say

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

CANADA: A NATION IN CHAOS

Persistent woodpecker boring a hole in the world's largest hockey stick in B.C.

(Thanks to Ralph)

We saw Persistent Woodpecker open for Hole.

'FARTD,' TO NAME ONE

Over 700 license plates banned in Florida

(Thanks to pharmaross)

BE STILL, OUR BEATING HEART

This may well be the world’s first-ever video of a bloody-belly comb jelly pooping!

(Thanks to GJ)

April 18, 2022

TURNS OUT IT'S A YETI PENIS

Loch Ness Monster not a whale’s penis, says professor who coined the theory

(Thanks to Emily, Leslie and w)

ATTENTION, D-I-Y-ERS:

Laser device for neutralizing - mosquitoes, asian hornet, weeds and pests

"Neutralizing."

What could possibly go wrong?

(Thanks to wiredog)

WAS IT GOOD FOR YOU?

Some fish cause Earth's oceans to move during sex

(Thanks to pharmaross, Jim Kenaston and Ralph)

WE LIVE IN WONDROUS TIMES

Woman 'quit nine to five' life by selling pictures of her feet online

(Thanks to John Lobert)

DA DOO RON RON RON, DA DOO RON RON

Why We Remember Music and Forget Everything Else

(Thanks to Steve K.)

WHERE'S THE PARADE?

It's National Columnists Day.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING

Flapjacks are too chewy to be taxed as cakes, tribunal rules

(Thanks to Ralph)

April 17, 2022

NAP TIME

Kindergartner brings pre-mixed margaritas for snack time at Michigan school

(Thanks to klezmerphan. pharmaross, Geoff Scott, Doug Ogg and Roberto)

CANADA: A NATION IN CHAOS, II

Canadian health agency mistakenly tweets porn link instead of latest Covid data

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

UNCLEAR ON THE CONCEPT

FENNVILLE, Mich. — What happens when you mix an Easter egg hunt with a haunted house?

(Thanks to pharmaross)

And happy Easter to those blogfolk who celebrate Easter.

CANADA: A NATION IN CHAOS

'Have you seen my wheels?' Tires taken from digital sign on Ontario road

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston and pharmaross)

IT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING

Dentist warns cavities can be contagious, spread through kissing

(Thanks to pharmaross)

April 16, 2022

CONNECTING

Alligator crosses road by Orlando International Airport

(Thanks to pharmaross)

 
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