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Priest resigns after learning he has performed baptisms wrongly for 20 years
(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)
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A career in Illinois as a poll watcher awaits.
Posted by: Clankie | February 15, 2022 at 08:44 AM
Sounds like a feature instead of a bug.
Posted by: Steverino | February 15, 2022 at 08:58 AM
"Dear Sir or Madam, I am sorry to inform you that you are not saved, as was previously thought. You are hereby condemned to hell until/unless you reapply for baptism, and the process is completed properly. Yours sincerely, The Pope."
Posted by: Rod | February 15, 2022 at 09:26 AM
Was he using fire instead of water?
Posted by: cfjk | February 15, 2022 at 09:28 AM
Dear Unsaved:
The only way to rectify this is to extend your new car warranty.
Posted by: Static Joeage | February 15, 2022 at 09:50 AM
The difference between "I" and "We" is a real nitpicker. Maybe it should be considered a slight misunderstanding, not a reason to condemn innocent souls to the Eternal Toaster.
Now, the Baptists don't have this problem. If you're not held under water too long, once you dry off, you're saved!
Well, a wise man once said: "Religion and Politics are topics best left untouched in polite conversation."
The fact that... Oh, is it "I" or "We" are here commenting pretty much says it for us or me.
Posted by: Le Petomane | February 15, 2022 at 10:15 AM
So the holy trinity is now me, myself & I? So now the Devil gets their souls, based strictly on a technicality? Demand to see the replay camaras, or as they say, pics or it didn't happen.
Posted by: Phyre N. Brimstone | February 15, 2022 at 10:28 AM
^5 Le Pet
Posted by: MOTW | February 15, 2022 at 10:43 AM
I'm Catholic but I feel like I'm pretty safe. I was baptized when I was a baby and then accidentally baptized two more times. I was sponsoring people who were joining the Church. The last time it happened the priest asked me why I didn't say something. What was I supposed to say? Watch it with that Holy Water Padre? I told him I figured it couldn't hurt me and I was just surprised the Holy Water didn't sizzle or get steamy when it hit me for the third time.
Posted by: nursecindy | February 15, 2022 at 11:00 AM
It is a throwback to the royal "We," dating from the time of the Holy Roman Empire. Now about that deacon who was baptizing with a squirt gun back in 2020...
Posted by: ripleysparrow | February 15, 2022 at 11:08 AM
I don't understand the problem with "we." In this century, God gets to choose pronouns like everyone else. "Wee" might be objectionable.
Posted by: Ralph | February 15, 2022 at 12:13 PM
Letter from the Pope:
"After review of your baptism ceremony, it has been determined that the holy church has performed an error. In order to rectify this error, please contact your closest parish immediately to schedule a new baptism.
Nature of the error: Mix-up of pronouns
What the Church is doing: Notifying all affected individuals and arranging for a new baptism with the correct pronoun
Cost: There will be no cost to you. However, donations will be accepted."
Posted by: ChrisinVa | February 15, 2022 at 02:39 PM
All affected persons are required to be exorcised, as a precaution.
Posted by: Ed. | February 15, 2022 at 08:17 PM