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February 26, 2022


U.S. ranks No. 2 in toilet paper usage

“Coming in behind China.”

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)


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I prefer to wipe my s!tty ass on a politician, but their overpaid lawyers said that could be considered as a biological attack, I've no option but to use TP.

The article says, "In fact one tree makes up about 1,500 toilet paper rolls each year."

If one particular tree makes that much paper, each and every year, the other trees must all be slackers.

Laissez les bonne temps rouler!

I believe a little research will disclose this reporter used to work for the Flathead County Beacon.

Get yourself a bidet. Problem solved!

So the U.S. uses 2.6 billion miles worth of toilet paper per year.

But it's only 1.6 billion miles to reach Uranus. Some days it seems longer.

There's obviously excessive toilet paper usage in the U.S. that extends beyond Uranus.

Must be a black hole.

Ok, but no Stairway.

China uses less than twice as much toilet paper as the USA, but it has more than 4 times the population. Work it out for yourselves which country is more full of sh1t.

The U.S. uses 2.6 billion miles of toilet paper per year.
And it's 1.6 billion miles to Uranus, this means we have enough to get there, but not enough to get back.

Wouldn't this leave a lot of toilet paper to circle Uranus and develop Klingons? There is trouble brewing here folks.

With all this toilet paper floating around in America, why can't anybody spare a square?

We need to share a square in order to save our friendships.

Maybe I should date a toiletpaper conserving communist that's sponge worthy.

And finishes with a swirl.

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