MEANWHILE IN THE NEVER-ENDING POLICE DRAMA THAT IS FLATHEAD COUNTY

9:54 p.m. A man who said he would call his wife after he got out of the shower still hadn’t called three hours later.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Comments

[Elaine Benes]

Sounds like he was in the shower so long that he suffered not only shrinkage, but severe wrinkling, and was just too ashamed to return the call?

[pharmaross]

@Elaine Benes

He was so shriveled, he couldn't get an extension.

[Flathead County Frank]

Since I live here, I decided to research some of the reports lest Blog readers get the wrong impression of Flathead Country.

12:23 p.m.- A man was blowing snow from his driveway and misplaced his dog.

Answer: A closer examination of a red spot in the blown snow disclosed the dog had been found.

12:59 p.m.-A local news team got in trouble for filming horses at fairgrounds without permission.

Answer: The reporter told the station manager; "As God is my witness, I didn't know horses didn't like being filmed!"

6:46 p.m.- A man reported a slingshot missing from his vehicle.

Answer: The complainer was John Doe, a relative newcomer. He was supposedly once a hitman for the Mafia who got fired for being incompetent.

I sincerely hope this helped show that folks here are simply normal people.

[LeDud]

6:46 p.m. A man reported a slingshot was missing from his vehicle.

This will surface in the Flathead Co. weapon buy-back program.

[man tom]

I was searching for real estate for sale in Flathead County and found many of the homes for sale are quite expensive. So, I did an about face. I plan to scout around for some property, find a suitable secluded lot in the woods then place my order with IKEA. Calling these people before construction is finished.

[Mr. Kleen]

Perhaps he asked the maid to cup his testicles so he wouldn't start to snore while in the shower and she hasn't finished cleaning the bathroom yet?

[Flathead County Frank]

man tom--Flathead County has a few bargains, just be patient shopping.

https://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-detail/539-Saint-Andrews-Dr-Unit-221D2_Columbia-Falls_MT_59912_M98690-94209

[man tom]

Flathead County Frank - I feel like a fool. I just agreed to buy my cousin Kevin's house. I'm too embarrassed to say how much I am giving him, but this is a real picture of the house.

The property just reminded me so much of where I grew up.

The red Willy's '43 Jeep was a bitchin' off road ride. The end of the John boat to the right of the picture added a nice touch to the yard decor. With a red army jeep a John boat and various trailers and the like sitting in our front yard I never understood some things. Like the time a high school aquaintance gave me a ride home from school on the back of his motorcycle. As we approached my house I say into the side of his helmet, "pull over here, that's my house across the street." We got off the bike and my friend says, "where's your house?" I said right there, pointing to my house with the red Jeep and John boat sitting in the yard. The guy says, "That's your house, I thought it was the garage."

I have mentioned I came from a *VERY* tough neighborhood.

I photoshopped myself out of the picture. I kinds look like the fish.

[man tom]

Oh, you see the house, the roof of the house, in the background behind the fish? I considered that a mansion.

[man tom]

Remember this song? I grew up in one and YES, you can bet your ass, it was pink.

[Le Petomane]

man tom--The Neiborhood I grew up in was so tough that if you asked a motorcycle rider where his helmet was the answer was always the same.

"Helmet? We don't need no stinkin'helmet. "Ya want to make somethin' outta that!"

BTW, nice pad you bought for a retreat.

[man tom]

Le Petomane - Ha, but that ain't tough. You want tough. My next door neighbor, next to my house with catfish displayed, started agitating an older guy who had move in recently to the house next to his, two doors down from me. Their back and forth went on for a while, my friend had a big mouth on him and he was cutting into the new guy in the neighborhood really good. Put him down bad. All at once, the new guy beat my friend about the head and face, must have hit him 20 times, beat him all the way across the street into the yard across the street. My friend's mother heard the commotion and came running out their front door, ran across the street, and pulled the new guy off her son who was beaten pretty bad by then. I was standing there the whole time watching all this. So, we find out the new guy had just ben released from prison and had moved there into his relatives house trying to find a new lease on life.

Oh, this guy lived close by and throughout our life we had a special bond coming from that neighborhood.

I didn't know her. I frequented the 1860 often at one time. Right down off broadway, which is 4th street, near the Arch. The Arch is considered Riverfront 1st street. Lived down there for a while.

[man tom]

From the first review:

"The parking lot has plenty of room but appears to be safe despite that it isn't fenced."

Years ago, I got my GF a job here. At the time I was going through a transition period in my life going from heavy drinking to even heavier drinking.

The reason I mention the review about the parking lot is because on night a little guy grabbed a hold of my balls and wouldn't let go. A huge fight ensued which I was winning until a giant bouncer can=me over and picked me up. I weigh in at 250 today. He carried me to the front door and tossed me onto the gravel parking lot. I landed flat on my back. Other than the time I took a tire tool to the head, the only fight I ever lost. Both fights were over the girl I got the job as a dancer.

Oh, this place. It was tough having a GF who just could not keep her clothes on.

I bet Flathead County Frank knows exactly what I'm talking about living in that town with all the crazy women around.

[man tom]

I know you've all had a time, some tougher than others, in your lives where this song is fitting.