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January 03, 2022

AND IN SPORTS

Monster crab attacks Australian golfers on Christmas Island

(Thanks to Ralph)

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They seemed amazingly good-humored about it. I guess they're used to such intrusions.

Bring this crab to the Masters this year let it follow Tiger around the course.

These guys weren't too imaginative. This thing could have fed all of them with meat left over.

I wonder if the rules of golf allow them to replace the club without penalty?

“They really like coming out after dusk and can be like a bit of a horror scene sometimes when you're having a barbie and a swarm of them start coming in from the trees,” they said. Crikey!

It's all big fun until they eat Amelia Earhart.

"This is Las Nessman reporting. Today, I am covering the Christmas Day golf tournament here on lovely Christmas Island.

"It is a lovely clear day and everyone seems to be enjoying this tournament. Wait a minute, we seem to have some kind of disturbance around the 6th. hole.

"I'm getting closer to see...OH! The humanity. The biggest, most vicious flipping crab you ever saw is attacking the golfers! Ladies, turn your heads and keep children from this horrible scene. As God is my witness, I thought crabs were found only in cans and seafood markets. This is terrible! I can't cover this carnage any longer. I'm out of here. Oh why, oh why, couldn't it have been turkeys?"

@ripleysparrow--- This would explain what happened to Amelia Earhart and her airplane.

Once they acquire a taste for Australian golfers there's no turning back.

Normally I would associate crabs with high school jocks and their groupies.

A few whacks with a 5 iron and game over.

Two statements in the article that could be related if taken out of context:

…we’ve been putting out… (I prefer to think ‘putting’ is the gerund of ‘put’.)

We think there was some old fruit in Al’s golf bag. NTTAWWT

Combine this with a case of the killer crabs.

Tim: Al, were you keeping an old piece of fruit in your golf bag?
Al: I don't think so, Tim.

^5 to Les Nessman Petomane!

BFD. They have crabs, we have gators. Makes the game more interesting.

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