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December 02, 2021


A Louisiana man busted early today for allegedly trying to enter a neighbor’s apartment at 2 AM explained to police that “a big snake told him to open the victim’s door and go inside,” according to an arrest affidavit.

(Thanks to pharmaross)


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Hard to believe. Now had He used Meth yes, entirely possible a big snake gave the order.

When has a talking snake ever sent humanity down a dark path?

Florida Man would have brought along the big snake to prove his story.

The snake just needed some help getting in to go to the bathroom.

This is when being a parselmouth would be of some use.

Unsurprising quote: told arresting officers that he had smoked crack “within the last hour.”

This is why one should never listen to a crack smoking snake, especially a big one.

Any time a snake talks to you, don't believe a single word that comes out over his slit tongue. Trust me on this!

Haven't been able to trust what snakes say ever since that incident with Adam and Eve in the Garden of Paradise.

Personally, I don't blame the snake so much, the real problem is those damn poison apples!

I don't evem like apples, but I can't turn down a nice plump, ripe pumpkin!

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