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August 27, 2021

APOCALYPSE UPDATE

Skateboards containing Tony Hawk’s blood sell out overnight

(Thanks to pharmaross)

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The nation's reaction of the news of the release speaks for itself.

I'm waiting for the boards that contain his feces. They will be much $$$$$ someday.

I've got a bid in on a signed poster of Tom Lester which includes an authentic 24" vintage antique milk container filled with Eva Gabor's bath water.

Hooky-bobbing, there's gonna be no stopping us now.

Tony Hawk opens his door one dark night to find his front yard filled with masked people carrying torches and holding pitchforks.

"What's this all about?", Hawk asks the man at his door.

"Y'know those expensive skateboards that was supposed to contain your blood."

"OK, what's the problem?"

"We had the boards tested an' there's just red paint, no blood."

"So?" Hawk says.

"So we're here to collect the real deal."

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