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June 29, 2021

THIS IS WHY PEOPLE HANG AROUND OUTSIDE WHALE KEG PARTIES

Ex-Cop Arrested For Smuggling 'Whale Vomit' Worth $77.5 Million

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

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So that lobster guy who got swallowed by a whale and then spit out is now worth more than his weight in gold? Someday, George Costannza will name his second child "Ambergris".

What a bizarre article. One of the perps involved was a "television mechanic" .. what the heck is that?

The article claims only one or two percent of sperm whales get sick enough to puke ambergris. I believe a scientific study would show this small number of whales spent too much time where rum manufacturers drain their waste. Even whales can't handle drinking rum without festive little plastic umbrellas.

Another reason why police department training and reform is at the top of this year's legislative agenda.

defn: television mechanic = one who finds the nightly news wrenching

And I remember wondering why it was that eating something good could make me feel so terrible, while vomiting something terrible could make me feel so good.

Amy Tan

They never did bother to say where he'd got the ambergris. It's supposed to be controlled because sperm whales are endangered, but magically the ocean doesn't seem to be involved. Maybe from Amazon.

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