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June 18, 2021

EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE A HOBBY

Nebraska man makes 60 naked skydiving jumps in 24 hours

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

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I believe that qualifies him for an honorary Florida driver's license.

I don’t recall from psychology class what the meaning of certain dreams is, though I guess we could say that he’s “living the dream.”

He's gonna need a LOT more Chap-stick.

"Don't look, Ethel! The guy that jumped out of that perfectly good airplane is naked as a plucked chicken."

What was the drag coefficient?

In order to determine the drag coefficient he'd require at least enough clothing to pass for a Vegas showgirl or perhaps Victoria's Secret runway model.

I think the pilot should get some recognition for having a naked guy jump out of his airplane 60 times in 24 hours. From the video, it looks like the pilot may have also been naked.

Let's send it out to Josh, our I Team reporter on scene.

"Josh, are you there?"

"Yes, Oh we're live...I have the idiot, Rian, who's parent's can't spell, right here with me, let's ask the moron why he did this stupid act."

"Rian, you are a moron...can you tell our viewers why you have the mental capacity of a goldfish."

"Don't make fun my my parent's spelling capabilities."

I have an uncle who was a Green Beret paratrooper. I'm almost 50% sure he never made that many jumps during the first ten years of his career. I'm 100% sure he never made any jumps while naked as the day he was born.

"As God is my witness..."

Well, that was SO impressive, next Thanksgiving our live turkeys will be fitted with parachutes. Stay tuned to WKRP for more on this late breaking story.

So he wasn't even wearing a parachute harness?

We WKRP fans must also take a moment to remember Frank Bonner, AKA "Herb Tarlek" on WKRP, who passed away at age 89. I hope he gets to meet a new "Big Guy"!

Herb Tarlek ran the sales department, so in the words of Les Nesman speaking to Doctor Johnny Fever "Do these stairs lead to the second floor?" To which DJ Fever responded "It all depends which way you're going". RIP, Mr. Bonner

On a more upbeat note Loni Anderson aka Jennifer Marlowe is still among us. Thought it might be time to post this classic exchange between Les ND DJ Fever:...
Les:"It's a helicopter, and it's coming this way. It's flying something behind it, I can't quite make it out, it's a large banner and it says, uh - Happy... Thaaaaanksss... giving! ... From ... W ... K ... R ... P!! What a sight, ladies and gentlemen, what a sight. The helicopter seems to be circling the parking area now, I guess it's looking for a place to land. No! Something just came out of the back of the helicopter! It's, uh, a dark object. Perhaps a skydiver. Plummeting to the earth from only two thousand feet in the air. A second, a third! No parachutes yet. Can't be skydivers... I can't tell just yet what they are, but - Oh my God, they're turkeys!! Johnny, can you get this? Oh, they're plunging to the earth right in front of our eyes! One just went through the windshield of a parked car! Oh, this is just terrible! The crowd is running around pushing each other! Oh, my goodness! Oh, the humanity! People are running about! The turkeys are hitting the ground like sacks of wet cement! Honestly, folks I don't know how much longer... the crowd is running for their lives."
[The radio transmission cuts off.]
Johnny: "Les? Les? Les, are you there? Les, isn't there... Thanks for that on-the-spot report, Les. Uh, for those of you who just tuned in, the Pinedale Shopping Mall has just been bombed with live turkeys. Film at eleven."

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