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April 22, 2021

IT WAS RELEASED AFTER PRODUCING ETC.

Turtle survives flying through windshield on I-95 near Daytona, hitting woman in head

(Thanks to Ralph, pharmaross and Kevin Meerschaert)

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Geez Louise. Port Orange is where we generally stop for lunch (not turtle soup!) on the way to and from Florida.

I'd look for a prankster with a catapult.

Gamera!

Obviously, it was trying to get to Miami Beach for spring break.

The strange thing about this is that it fell off a pig, so just another day in Florida one would suppose.

As if the pythons and alligators and water moccasins aren't dangerous enough, now Florida has flying turtles?

Did it have a valid Florida pilot's license?

And wasn't Flying Turtles Mark Volman's and Howard Kaylan's acid rock band?

Amazingly, the turtle survived.

They gave the turtle a name?

'a half-inch to an inch cut above one eye but did not lose consciousness'

I was hit in the head by a 2 x 4 and retained the exact same injury. I was ten years old and previously had a turtle as a pet, OK?

Must have been passing a Shell station.

What's a turtle doing on the highway?

About one-mile-per-hour.

Obviously a game of Mario Kart gone wrong. Did it have a blue, green, or red shell?

This is where I got my first turtle. Besides the little plastic palm tree and plastic housing container He came with, this is where I got my first turtle accessory to keep his super hard shell from looking dull.

Dime Store Turtle Orgy, D.S.T.O., was bumped at Monterey by Janis Joplin.

Good thing it didn't muss up his hair.

MISTER WIZARD!

Mitch McConnell could not be reach for comment.

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