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January 22, 2021


Haggis launched to the edge of space in celebration of Burns Night

(Thanks to Jay Brandes, who says "not far enough.")


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And the earth is spared invasion until the aliens figure out how to digest haggis.

This from Wiki: Burns Night is the day (and night) that the life of Robert Burns is commemorated, particularly in Scotland. Each year it is on Burns' birthday, 25 January. People around the world have Burns Suppers.

At Burns Suppers, Scottish people have many certain traditions as eating haggis and people say poems that have been written by Robert Burns. These consist of To a Mouse, Address to the Haggis and many others. There is always a part in the Burns Supper when boys jokingly make fun of the girls. This is called 'Toast to the Lassies' However, the girls have the last laugh as they do the same to the boys. This is called 'Reply From the Lassies' ...So a Toast to the Lassies: "If Timmy feeds you haggis one more time, throw him back in the well".

Why are we trying to make the aliens mad at us?

I have it on good authority that if the haggis had actually entered space, many intelligent species would consider an orbiting haggis as an act of war.

The Roswell aliens advised that haggis should have been banned by the Geneva Convention. After a little consideration, they added lutefisk to the list of substances that could start an interplanetary and warned there are likely other substances that should never,ever under any conditions be shot into space.

Haggis, Lutefisk, and and other toxic substances should never be launched into space. Can you imagine the disaster if that bag of haggis hit an orbiting satellite?

What struck me about this article is that haggis comes in sealed bags, like potato chips. I guess it says something about the Scots.

Given the risks, secrecy must be maintained about what was stuffed last-minute into the defroster vents of the Space Tesla. Not Milk Duds.

Just one? Why not all of them?

That took some guts.


Follow this up with a volley of Yulecaga.

Better than eating it.

..My haggis is in space
..My haggis is not here
..My haggis is in space
..A leaving the atmosphere....

^5 LeDud!

"Man's inhumanity to man makes countless thousands mourn!"

I feel I should write a short poem on haggis that Burns never got around to writing. ( with apologies to William Blake)

To a haggis

Haggis, haggis, burning bright
In the forest skies at night
What mortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

In what deep and distant skies
Will the dreaded haggis burn in fire
On what dare will they aspire
To dine on the haggis on fire?

I may be Scottish but I draw the line at haggis...

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