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January 28, 2021

THE NEWS FROM JAPAN

A Man Ate a Toothpick and It Was Stuck in His Butt for Months

This has been The News From Japan.

(Thanks to Ralph) 

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The only man in history who had an answer for why he had a stick up his butt.

Dr.'s were happy to report no popcorn was found logged in his butt. A scientific study regarding a correlation is in the planning stages.

I'm calling BS on this. You mean to tell me a toothpick somehow managed NOT to get stuck in all those twists and turns of intestines (if not earlier), but then did get stuck in the very last part of the journey?

No way in hell. It got there in some other, probably much more interesting to this blog, manner.

So the story goes: A man is so badly constipated after eating headcheese that he goes to his physician seeking relief. The doc instructs him to drop his drawers and peers into his distress exclaiming, "I don't know what it is, but it's looking back at me!"

There was an episode on House,MD where the doctors pinned internal bleeding on a toothpick that had been swallowed and perforated an intestine. This should cause an immediate emergency ban on toothpicks and consider them terrorist weapons with severe penalties for possession of even a single toothpick.

https://youtu.be/FvdHLm1zoio

The homeopathic solution for this is to send in an army of termites.

The toothpick was 7 centimeters long, according to the article. That's 2 and 3/4 inches. How could anyone "accidentally" swallow a toothpick that long? I'm also calling BS on this.

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