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January 15, 2021


Debate Rages Over Whether Single Speeding Cheeto Could Destroy Space Station

(Thanks to Rick Day)


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The Speeding Cheetos toured with Meatloaf.

Captain, (Scotty) it looks like the guacamole shields are starting to fail!

Flaming hot crunchy - absolutely. And the red powder will stain the earth for ever.

Note to science guys:

"Please explain, in simple layman's terms, exactly how that single speeding Cheeto made it into space and targeted the space station?"

C'mon, Le Pet. You know it's your neighbors doing the equivalent of throwing their trash on the side of the road as they travel to visit family elsewhere.

If you use your imagination...Fly, Cheeto, Fly.

If you read it from some anonymous poster on the Internet, it must be true.

What about a two-year-old fast food french fry that I just found under my car seat?

Rod Nunley--The Roswell space aliens would never toss out a Cheeto. They love the things, and say they would never have achieved faster than light space travel by being stupid and wasteful. They have some sort of what they call a molecular disruptor for getting rid of trash. One evening we saw a raccoon jump in their trash can. There was a flash of blue light and that raccoon was no more. They offered to let us use it, but after seeing what happened to that poor raccoon, none of us will go near it.

Any complete set of blog remarks must assert that interstellar Cheetos are often traveling at highly increased velocities due to gas emissions from Uranus.

I'm so glad that 's solved, now we can move on the these the question that bothered humanity for ages:
How many furlongs in a fortnight?

What if, instead of a Speeding Cheeto, it was hit by a Cheating Speedo?

" when Frito creator Charles Doolin invented the Cheeto in 1948, he probably didn’t have hypervelocity impacts or space travel in mind."

Or greasy orange fingers, for that matter.

All we are is Cheetos in the wind.

Still trying to determine how many fur shorts in a furlong.

When I saw the headline, I envisioned orange powder floating all through the space station or coating the interior if the surface attracts the powder the way my hands and whatever I'm wearing do. Then I read the story and was disappointed.

Kinetic weaponry is deadly. Just sayin.

A fruitcake, 5 year old, can destroy a tank, if dropped from Apache helicopter.

Cheetos from space are the new rods from god.

If I ever do buy Dave's Stratocaster (Or he donates it to me....) my band has to be named "SSC", Single Speeding Cheeto. Look at all the other bands with TLA (Three letter acronym) names:


SSC would be a shoe-in to be on that list!

The Cheeto will be out of office in a few days, but I don't think the ISS is his planned destination.

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