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January 18, 2021

FRANCE ON HIGHEST POSSIBLE ALERT

Gwyneth Paltrow’s vagina-scented candle explodes into flames causing an ‘inferno’ in a woman’s living room

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

Comments

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Sounds like someone found the G-spot.

All I can think of is the video for the Rolling Stones' "She Was Hot." Which was banned by some outlets because it featured...well, you can look for it and see for yourself.

The fire notwithstanding, somehow this doesn't seem like a good gift idea.

Is it available in Blythe Danner as well?

Didn't Gwyneth Paltrow's Vagina open for...no, perhaps I shouldn't go there.

The media consultant told The Sun: “The candle exploded and emitted huge flames, with bits flying everywhere.

"I’ve never seen anything like it. The whole thing was ablaze and it was too hot to touch.

So...much like sex with Gwyneth, then?

Inquiring minds etc.

This sounds like two very intriguing news headlines. One before the dash, the other after.

A candle from the same person wo advocated for steam cleaning your vagiana. What couldn't go wrong?

What's that smell?

2nd try, "What's that smell?"

Who would pay good money for a candle that smells like a vagina???

This will likely be made into a movie. Now for the title...

How about "Scent Of A Woman"?

Hoo-ah!

This HAS to be from the ONION....this can't be reality...

I think these candles are being exported to Australia as there are many news reports about bush fires there.

Makes scents to me. When she said they "threw it out the front door", were they referring to the candle, or to Gwyneth?

If given a choice, I'd rather have the candle. It seems less weird.

It's cheaper to throw a foil wrapped fish in the microwave.

How long until some celebrity starts selling “this smells like my anus” potpourri?

And the nation goes on lockdown.

Have you tried her "This tastes like my rectum" fudge?

https://youtu.be/hib4n9RmFrQ

This would be the perfect gift for the wife who is always complaining that nothing excites her anymore.

The candle must have been mislabeled. Surely this was her classier Smells Like My Farts candle, and we know what happens when you light THOSE.

@Mad Hatter---Yes, some folks like to add spice and excitement into this sad, dreary world.

https://youtu.be/ssK6sLkDDgw


https://youtu.be/I6ZX9G8d-iM

Blythe Danner, I've always thought you were a beautiful and classy lady but still, what sort of chemicals did you ingest while you were gestating your daughter?

I don't recall seeing this sort of enthusiasm in the blog comments since Jack Bauer was turning people's thighs into hamburger. By the way, off topic, is President-Elect Barry being inaugurated tomorrow? They keep talking about some other guy.

It occurred to me that this would never happen to a guy. No man is ever able to find the ignition button.

I suppose there's a quality control job in here for someone.

I saw Gwyneth Paltrow's Vagina open for Toad The Wet Sprocket.

Proving once again it's ALL about the "O".

I saw Gwyneth Paltrow's Vagina open for Steely Dan.

We saw Gwyneth Paltrow's Vagina open for The USC Trojan Marching Band.

Isn't that how the USC Trojans football team usually enters the field?

https://youtu.be/iiclhcJTU1o

https://youtu.be/HGVShoAWp00

As always, it all boils down to the state of feminine hygiene,

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