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October 17, 2020

NOT UNHINGED AT ALL!

News Anchor Threatens to Murder Alaska Mayor After Their Texting Affair

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, who says "Send her to Washington.")

Comments

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She is taking it a lot like Charles Manson did when his song was rejected by the Beach Boys.

She seems nice, and appears to be single.

Glenn Close wants her character back.

In Mayor Sticky-fingers defense, he was most likely just performing an air-drum solo.

There are certain similarities between Alaska and Florida.

Remember, Sara Palin was from Alaska.

I'm sure deep down she has a good heart. In fact authorities are now trying to figure out who this heart belonged to before she got her hands on it.

I agree with nursecindy, when you get a secondhand heart you don't know who was using it first. Her heart, however, likely came from Auto Zone or from a museum exhibit. I do know if she came after me, I would change my name, move to Canada and become a lumberjack.

I know for certain my heart is in the right place. I also know the cardiac surgeon who put it there and he can verify this fact.

Maria...I’ve just texted a girl named Maria.

Alaska can do that to ya.

Jane L just sang a song from NORTH-WEST SIDE STORY.

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