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I have always appreciated Dave’s writings since he was a kid writing on his mama’s living room walls.
He still reflects the views of America more clearly than Americans!
I hereby nominate Dave for president of the U S of America.
You ain’t alive if you don’t vote for Dave.
Respectfully,
elizabeth conboy
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America would be more American. Dave! I second.
Posted by: Yes Dave for President | July 26, 2020 at 08:44 PM
Go for it Dave! And make Lucy your VP.
Posted by: Qaz | July 26, 2020 at 08:49 PM
I would love *-* to see Dave as president.
Posted by: Unarmed | July 26, 2020 at 08:51 PM
Dave I totally support you for president however be prepared for the questions you'll face if you, for instance, call Kim Jong Un a booger head. First the fact you drew on your mom's walls will be brought up. Then they'll ask why you wore Soviet style eyeglasses when you were in school. To prove this point they'll pass around your school pictures showing you wore those glasses and will mention that Moscow Russia is only 4600 miles from Armonk, NY. A quick bike ride?
Also I think a better campaign motto would be:
You ain't brave
If you don't vote for Dave.
Posted by: nursecindy | July 26, 2020 at 08:55 PM
Selecting Hubert Humphrey as your running mate would improve your chances with those voters who "ain't alive."
Posted by: Mad Hatter | July 26, 2020 at 08:57 PM
I like the idea that I reflect the views of America MORE CLEARLY THAN AMERICANS. (Emphasis added.)
Posted by: Dave | July 26, 2020 at 09:33 PM
The bar is incredibly low. I'm for Dave!
Posted by: Steve B | July 26, 2020 at 09:34 PM
Would this be a good campaign motto: Thank God for Dave. Thank God for Brave.
Or is that too long?
Posted by: Shabby | July 26, 2020 at 09:41 PM
A vote for Dave is NOT a vote for a lower bar, it's a vote for an OPEN BAR!
Posted by: cfjk | July 26, 2020 at 09:43 PM
America! Not Americans.
Yes? No?
Posted by: Shabby | July 26, 2020 at 09:55 PM
America. Music for quiet living. Dave.
Yeah?
Posted by: Shabby (once again) | July 26, 2020 at 10:01 PM
Something in my smile for everyone. Dave The America!
Posted by: Shabby (once more) | July 26, 2020 at 10:08 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8cRAoICjrA "Monday every time that I turn around" ...every campaign needs a rousing theme song, this may be the perfect one for a quarantine themed campaign.
Posted by: cfjk | July 26, 2020 at 10:30 PM
I like the idea of a cabinet full of Rock Bottom Remainders. I have one, so why not the White House too?
Posted by: Jim | July 26, 2020 at 11:19 PM
America, the heartland of no more idols, or idiots. Vote. Dave.
Posted by: Governor | July 26, 2020 at 11:54 PM
C’mon Dave, the bar is stupendously low! It’s like the smell of coconut!,
Posted by: Birthday Eve | July 27, 2020 at 12:12 AM
Dave in 2020. What's the worst that could happen? Or: Dave in 2020. It can't get any worse. Or: Dave in 2020. At least he's trying to be funny.
I think you have a mandate. (Which now that I look at it is a weird word)
Posted by: Ruthie | July 27, 2020 at 12:14 AM
If you want to fight with me, you'll have to stand in line.
Posted by: man tom | July 27, 2020 at 01:10 AM
Times are tense.
We need a real comedian.
Doesn't Ukraine have a comedian?
Posted by: Bob Pert | July 27, 2020 at 01:39 AM
Dave's vision for America is 20/20.
The cabinet needs a Department of Humor.
Posted by: staticjoeage | July 27, 2020 at 06:22 AM
In the current state of affairs, cabinet posts for Larry, Moe and Curly would be a logical start. Running mate, whomever it is, should have a sense of humor (too bad Will Rogers isn't around anymore).
Posted by: anthony stewart | July 27, 2020 at 07:16 AM
The Dream is alive.
Posted by: Alkali Bill | July 27, 2020 at 08:32 AM
Sorry everybody but, I like Dave to much to wish anything as horrible as politics upon him.
Posted by: Mr.l Bill | July 27, 2020 at 08:48 AM
^5 and bravo to nursecindy!
elizabeth conboy ==>
Cozy Babe Hotline
Yeah: "He still reflects the views of America more clearly than Americans."
Whose views does he reflect .. the people of America .. i.e. Americans ?
Posted by: MOTW | July 27, 2020 at 10:15 AM
DAVE BARRY FOR PRESIDENT!
How hard can the job be?
Posted by: Le Petomane | July 27, 2020 at 10:52 AM
Most Americans can't reflect any views if they require more than 140 characters.
Posted by: wanderer2575 | July 27, 2020 at 11:44 AM