IT'S AN EPIDEMIC

Doctors Remove A Blue Tilapia From a Chinese Man's Rectum After He 'Accidentally Sat On It'

Ambulance viewers stunned after man calls 999 to report ‘cucumber stuck up his bottom’

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Comments

[Le Petomane]

More proof that the Roswell space aliens are correct when they claim strange things happen when Uranus is involved.

[pharmaross]

https://www.nzherald.co.nz/world/news/article.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=12342107

[man tom]

With a population of 1.4 billion...the odds are someone will accidentally sit on a Blue Talaipa and find it their rudder.

[Rudolph]

Thankfully, due to strict blog policy, no one will make fun of the name Guangdong Television.

[JG]

The fish was had to find because it's always in the last place you want to look...

[nursecindy]

I never saw a cucumber or fish stuck in somebody but I did see a lot of Mini Maglites. Most of them had to be surgically removed and yes, we did make fun of them.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Calling nursecindy! I don't even want to think about a blue (or any other color, for that matter) tilapia stuck there.

[wanderer2575]

Another reason I don't go anywhere near seafood unless it's square, breaded, and from a box.

[cfjk]

Just a few points offered for discussion here: (1) Are blue tilapia a migratory species? (2) Doesn't light kill some venereal diseases, so were those maglite guys just self-medicating (and are we sure they were all minis)? (3) Are gerbils vegetarians and does that explain the cucumber thing (and are we sure it wasn't a pickle and the author was employing poetic license as it were, to the spelling of cucumber) as his just being considerate of other mammals?

[cfjk]

As far as those constipation issues go, sure there are over-the-counter meds, but dietary is reall the way to go. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ku42Iszh9KM

[anthony stewart]

Did they eat it after it was pulled from his ass? Wouldn't surprise me, par for the course on "delicacies."

[Math-Yoda]

Maybe this guy was just trying to understand other languages, but he got the wrong end of the stick, so to speak, with his Babel fish.

[Math-Yoda]

Hey, Nursecindy— Did you ever ask those Maglite guys just what they were looking for up there in the dark?

[PirateBoy]

I always knew Maglites had 1001 uses. Now they have1002.

Now I know why their gaskets were always coated in Vasoline....

[cfjk]

That's why you never buy a used maglite.

[ImNotDave]

What goes on between a person and their fish in the privacy of their dwelling is of no concern to me.

[The Real Barry]

About the Maglites: there's a blues that goes "The sun's gonna shine on my backdoor someday". Mind you, the name of the blues is appropriate: "Trouble in Mind".