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June 23, 2020

TUESDAY NIGHT OPEN THREAD

Our theme tonight is: comments you would have made last night if the comments had been working.

WITH FRIENDS LIKE THAT...

Indian man lets 60,000 bees cover his FACE and says the insects are 'like his best friends'

(Thanks to Ralph)

HE'LL FIGHT FOR YOU

Attorney Charged With Criminal Mischief for Egging Judge’s Car

(Thanks to Kevin Smith and John Lobert)

NEED TO RESTORE A PAINTING?

We suggest you hire a professional.

(Thanks to Roberto)

THE COMMENTS

They appear to be open again. It turns out we needed to transmogrify the Carnelli bloximator and recalibrate the counter-pinion clavicle thrusters.

No, for real, we have no earthly idea why the comments are back. But apparently they are. 

IT'S LOOKING BETTER ALL THE TIME

We would only need 110 people to start a new civilisation on Mars, scientists say

(Thanks to vee, who says "Now that Typepad has rejected us, maybe the blog people could all relocate")

CONSTIPATED?

Do not do this.

Related: A 40-year-old man in China reportedly suffered three bladder tears after drinking ten beers and then holding pee in for a shocking 18 hours.

(Thanks to Ralph)

HOW CAN WE BE SURE?

Gwyneth Paltrow Released A New Candle And This Time It Smells Like Her Orgasms

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

 
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