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May 28, 2020


Man says he broke into San Diego Wells Fargo bank to heat up his Hot Pockets

(Thanks to Ralph)


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Maybe he was able to heat it up in the roast police vehicle?

Yes, but only later, and given the restraints not really what he was going for.

You can't normally buy Hot Pockets. You can only buy cold pockets and heat them yourself.

In the Old West, Wells Fargo was kind enough to leave some firewood in back of their stage stops so a hungry traveler could build a fire and have a nice hot meal.

This poor dude just hasn't adjusted to the harshness of modern times.

Oh, Jim Gaffigan, you rascal.

My first thought too AmoebaStampede.

Yeah, his pockets certainly would have been "hot" when they got filled with other people's money.

It's ok. After he eats that hot pocket, he'll have to make a deposit.

Another Gaffigan fan here.

"Hell, yeah, it was worth it."

I can definitely see Jim saying that in a commercial.

The Hot Pocket dough then had a checking account opened without its knowledge.

The Hot Pocket dough then had a checking account opened without its knowledge.

As a friend said, "Everybody knows that banks have the best microwaves."

*adds "heat up his Hot Pockets" to list of euphemisms*

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