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March 30, 2020


Or Thursday. What difference does it make?


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Is this stay-at-home stuff starting to get old? Or, is it just me?

I agree. You are starting to get old.

It's Monday! The start of a beautiful new week full of surprises and fun! I've decided to take up drinking and I'm really regretting the fact I quit smoking three months ago.

What year?

I'm still coming in to the office to work. I'm going to try to work from home tomorrow. The county started a new procedure yesterday where everyone coming into a workplace has to sign a form swearing up and down that they aren't coughing, running a fever, and haven't been traveling. When the time comes that I have to pee into a cup to come to work, I'm staying home even if I can't get my job done.

We received our 'no-touch' thermometer today. The box is from China so we have not opened it. Once we find the courage to take it out of the box, a giant leap of faith will be needed to actually 'touch it'. So far exactly as advertised. No one here will touch it.

Going into my third week of working from home. The first week was the second week of a perpetual rainstorm. I was practically insane by the end of that week. Then last week it dried out. Great; you could go outside and walk, bike, whatever. Much easier to endure

This week, it's raining again. This is Texas, dammit! We're supposed to have a week of biblical deluge in May, and that's it for the year. Why can't the weather cooperate with the virus better on this?

They must both work for the government....

The blog's 2020 Year in Review should have that 'Stay the Ef at home' song playing when you open the thread to read.

I see Lucy running into a problem stealing TP from the neighbors since everyone is home. She should sniff around and hire like a hit-dog to it for her and let things cool down a while.

Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.

Monday is trash night, that’s what difference it makes.

I guess that giant asteroid on a collision course with Earth can turn around and go home. Looks like we won't be needing it.

Jimmy Carr, host of The Big Fat Quiz of the Year and a kazilliondy-billiondy other shows I like, started a delightful web series today called The Little Tiny Quiz of the Lockdown. One video for the questions and one for the answers coming up each day.

Not gonna lie, I thought the book title represented in one question by the emoticons Gold Medal, Leg, and Crap was The Terry Fox Story.

Got out of the house twice today by walking the dog. Oh, the excitement.

What day is it? What month?

For March it’s been summer like weather in southeast Texas with highs near 90 last week. Clouds today kept temperatures in the low 80s. Still too warm for this time of year. I’d rather have winter back.

Some people.

Other people.

Monday means a Metallica concert YouTube at 8pm est!!!!!!!!
P. S. If you guys fancy watching a feel-good documentary, pull up ‘Mission to Lars’.

I would like to announce I have a new imaginary girlfriend, Beth.

Now I'm not lonely anymore! I met her in my dreams!

We romp and dance in the yard. We talk about getting a puppy! His name will be Skipper!
HA, HA, what fun we will have!

And some day, she will be my bride!

Thanks, AmoebaStampede! I took the quiz and did terrible. (His "Les Misérables" clue reminded me of this blog, for some odd reason.)

Gonna go back for the new quiz tomorrow!

Glad you liked it, klezmerphan! Vive les Misérablahs!


Dave, how does Walter keep from catching Covid-19?
And what happened to Walter, anyway? Haven't see the Big Guy in ages!

This is a great parody: Do Re Mi set to Covid-19 themes, and featuring the original cast from The Sound of Music

Jan's link as a Link.

Burt -Tell us more about Beth... What is she like? What are her interests? I might as well live vicariously through your imaginary relationship, right? Let us know when the imaginary date is set, and where you're registered, so we can all get you imaginary gifts.

Meanwhile: Enjoy

oh god was this Monday? Noooooooooo

We had the roof replaced today, so my daughter's dog spent the day with me in the basement instead of barking at every sound above ground. I'd like to say that I was a good host, but I think I just bored her with four hours of calls.

I miss the commute on the train. All four hours of it a day.

Bad nursecindy! You are NOT sorry you quit smoking.

Thanks to Jan and PirateBoy! "Mission to Lars" looks amazing. I'm definitely going to check it out.

In a recent blog, Dave detailed his renewed interest in jigsaw puzzles to while away the hours, as we embrace social distancing during the covid-19 pandemic.

America has picked up on this pastime. Here's a link to a CBS Sunday Morning piece by Mo Rocca delving deeper into the jigsaw puzzle craze...


Update from the Middle Coast, out in the middle of nowhere: The streets are empty. Eerily quiet.

In other words, a normal day out here.

If you click play and have a few minutes to waste a little more of your time away listen as Ted reveals the best thing about being confined to his home for an extended time is He gets to, "watch Shemane get out of the shower and dry off each day."

Today I learned that, technically, I've been exposed to the virus, so please cover your eyes as you read this.

I'd taken a non-driver grocery shopping for his dad, also a non-driver (we're obviously not in Florida). Someone who knows me called me over to her car while we were making our way across the parking lot. I got within a few feet of the door of the car. I'm sure she just wanted to say "hi," but then she let me know that she'd been tested for the virus. Today she learned that the test came out positive.

I of course appreciated her calling me over to let me know. Her daughter walked by me in the store, as she was doing the shopping (someone has to). The car was otherwise full of grandchildren. I'm hoping they'll all be fine.

My guess is that we'll all eventually be exposed to it, and probably in similarly frustrating ways. Thankfully I've had no symptoms yet, other than those of my seasonal allergies.

I'll be sure to yell out "Unclean," once I can get back to my daily walks/jogs alongside the Geezer Bus. Save a seat for me once this is all over.

Today was Eric Clapton's 75th birthday.

Given what's going on right now, I suspect that his birthday will be remembered on a high note.

On a more serious note, I'm currently volunteering at my wife's assisted-living facility that's full of elderly residents.

If you want to see something fascinating, simply open the door to anyone's room, every TV is glued to CNN or Headline News or Fox, they've stopped doing anything but watching the TV, it's Coronavirus Deathwatch 24/7.

Does it matter that we're practically in the middle of nowhere, with no major metropolitan area within 200 miles? All unnecessary visitors are being turned away? The only people in or out are medical professionals?

Is there anything that any one of them can do differently to save themselves?

No, they're actually pretty darn safe at the moment, but it doesn't matter, it's like watching people hooked on pandemic porn. For once, I'd actually welcome seeing someone binge-watching Lawrence Welk on a TV somewhere inside the building, The Dukes of Hazzard (even after Bo and Luke left the show), or maybe even...The Core.

If you have parents or loved ones that are watching Pandemic Porn, change the channel for them, or shoot their TV, because there's absolutely nothing useful that they can gain by watching the 24-hour news channels.

I went to the Dollar store yesterday because I was out of Depends (don’t ask) when I was accosted by a lady who insisted in engaging me in conversation, some gibberish about her adopted son, a duck and Washington, D.C. Or something like that, I’m not sure. I backed away when she started breathing on me and my first thought was making a sign of a crucifix while yelling “unclean, unclean.”
I didn’t want make a scene, so I told her I had home emergency I had to wash my hair. Since I’m completely bald I don’t think she believed me.
Once home I was relieved in that I didn’t have any symptoms but realized I got ladies’ Depends. Oh well, nobody’ll notice.

What Social Distancing Looked Like in 1666:


Yesterday I wore navy blue pants to work and thought they were black.

I'm just hoping tomorrow they say, "April Fools' Day! We really got you this time!"

Here in Vermont we kind of shelter in place all the time...
34 mile round trip to the nearest grocery store - 13 miles to work-
I think keeping track of the day of the week may not be necessary
for a while.

More about jigsaw puzzles...


@Jeff M

Hope you are feeling better. We heard you were (non-virus) ill.

Thanks, Cheesewiz. Two different but unrelated (or so they seem) ailments, neither breathing related. One day at a time.

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