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March 20, 2020

MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY

4:14 p.m. A grocery store employee called 911 to report that a woman had been in the store’s bathroom for an extended period of time. The employee thought that the woman was either doing drugs or eating donuts.

(Thanks to Craig Roberts)

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6:19 p.m. A Kalispell woman accidentally called 911 on her phone while she was taking a lasagna out of the oven.
I hope she sent some to the 911 operator. I have a feeling the woman in the bathroom was eating donuts while stealing their toilet paper. She probably did the drugs before going to the store.

6:19 p.m. A Kalispell woman accidentally called 911 on her phone while she was taking a lasagna out of the oven.

This usually happens to me when I do linguine.

10:16 p.m. A man called 911 because he saw a man with a sheet over his head in a parked car. Turns out the guy was just napping.

That's a relief. He could've been the villain in a Scooby-Doo episode...

4:37 p.m.--Three men got into a fight at a Mexican restaurant.

The rest of the story; The men had just eaten a bowl of the restaurants special called chili surprise. There was only one men's room and one nearly empty roll of toilet paper.
In many places this would have caused more than just a simple 911 call.

"The employee thought that the woman was either doing drugs or eating donuts."

This is redundant.

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