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March 20, 2020

ATTENTION, SELF-QUARANTINERS:

I made you a really unhelpful self-help video. (Give it a little while to get started.)

AND IMMEDIATELY TRADED IT IN FOR A 24-PACK OF CHARMIN

Woman gives birth in toilet paper aisle of Springfield Walmart

(Thanks to Kevin Meershcaert, who asks "Did she name the kid Scott?")

WE ALL NEED SOMETHING NICE RIGHT NOW

...so, here.

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY

4:14 p.m. A grocery store employee called 911 to report that a woman had been in the store’s bathroom for an extended period of time. The employee thought that the woman was either doing drugs or eating donuts.

(Thanks to Craig Roberts)

LUCKY BASTARDS

An Australian family accidentally ordered $3,264 worth of toilet paper when they bought 48 boxes instead of 48 rolls

(Thanks to The Perts)

SWELL. WHERE'S OUR FLYING CAR?

This drone can play dodgeball – and win

(Thanks to Dave Stuff)

 
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