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February 11, 2020

THE NEWS FROM ABROAD

We don't totally understand it. But it sounds bad.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

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"We have used every dollar in our coffers including buying a knobkerrie, a spear, needles, black cloth Madzibaba claimed would be used in his prayers to relieve pain and stop erection.
Maybe they should spend whatever dollar they have left by going to a medical doctor and getting a shot of Valium or something else that has been medically proven to work.
Coffers? Bedding the wife? Was this written in the 1800's?

And I thought we were the only ones having elections.

Eastview is part of Miami, right? Kind of near the river and the expressway?

It's amazing what voodoo dolls can do these days.

That reads exactly like the script of a Bollywood movie I saw last year.

Don't you just hate it when you're trapped with runyoka juju?

This can't be happening!

What, exactly, do we think is happening?

I hate when someone uses runyoka on me.

From googling around:
Runyoka is made by Traditional Medical Practitioners to preserve marriages. This is a spell used by a man to catch those who commit adultery with his wife. Men are always busy and sometimes they go out of the country for different types of duties. As a result sometimes they do not have peace of mind if they don’t lock up their wives if they suspect them of committing adultery.

Definition of juju (Entry 1 of 2)
1: a fetish, charm, or amulet of West African peoples
2: the magic attributed to or associated with jujus

Translation: I bedded your wife with a hard on that lasted for a month. I'm prepared to hear your quick fix suggestion.

Maybe they got juju beads stuck somewhere?

Voodoo customer:

"Did you sell the juju that gave that man a month's long erection?"
"Uh, what if I did?"
"I want to buy a 30 day supply in 30 individual doses please."

I have to say, I'm totally surprised that the knobkerries didn't work.

I saw Runyoka Juju open for Deep Purple at Budokan.

This seems to be a rare case where a language barrier actually enhances the story.

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