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February 12, 2020

DEPARTMENT OF WAY TOO MUCH SPARE TIME

Lunatic Returns Canned Corn Kernels To Cobs To Determine Approximately How Many Cobs Are In A Can

(Thanks to John Lobert)

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Spoiler Alert: two.

Waaay too much work. While most people get good results with guesstimates, it would have been easier to count the number of kernels or kernel spaces on a cob vs the number of kernels in a can without putting them back on the cob. Guess that wasn't OCD enough. While corn just cut off the cob is mandatory for my Grandma's corn oysters, a good Bourbon corn pudding can be made with a combination of frozen and creamed-style canned corn. Forget whole-kernel canned corn whether from Russia or elsewhere.

When I worked in mental hospitals,patients tried things like this. Invariably, another patient would nave grabbed the nearly filled ear of corn and eaten it.
Then general chaos would erupt causing minor injuries, orderlies and security being called and patient's meds increased.
At the end of the day, no one would know (or care) how many kernels of corn it takes to make a full ear.

Let's get this guy working on more important stuff, like "Who won the Iowa Caucus?"
Or, "How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?"

"Lunatic" is so judgemental.

Put this guy to work on figuring out the number of jelly beans needed to fill a car, or other such contests.

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